Fourth Down (Portland Pioneers 1)

As I run out, I salute Reggie and Roxy, letting them know I’m thinking of them. Along with me are Jesse McAvoy and Tank Arthur. We head to the center of the field and shake hands with our opponents. It’s then that I see the weather girl walking toward us.

“What the fuck?” I mutter under my breath. How did I not hear that she was here to do the coin toss? If I had, I wouldn’t be standing here right now. I can’t stand her, yet I find myself focused on what she’s wearing. Any other time we’ve had a woman out here, she’s in heels. But not Autumn. She’s in flats, with tight fitting jeans, and a Pioneers T-shirt. Her long dark hair is braided, but it’s not one of those tight ones I’ve seen so many times. This one is messy, almost as if she didn’t care she was going to stand in front of thousands of people and do something important. Well, it’s important to me. To the teams playing today. It might not be to her.

The referee starts talking, repeating the same thing we hear week after week. Autumn stands in the center of us and asks if we’re ready. Everyone nods or mumbles a response, except for me.

“Home team, what’s your call?”

“Tails,” I say as I meet Weather Girl’s gaze. She tries to smile but her attempt fails. She takes a deep breath and then tosses the coin in the air. All eyes are on it as it spins through the air, somersaulting until it bounces on the turf and then finally settles on a side.

“Heads!” the referee yells out and instantly turns his attention to our opponent.

I’m fuming. I have never lost a coin toss at home before. Ever. And this chick shows up and we lose. I find myself stepping toward her. “If we lose the game, it’s your fault.” Her mouth drops open, but she says nothing. I don’t give her a chance because I’m running toward the sideline. I’m not paying attention to where I’m going and almost run right into Noah.

“Well, this is different,” he says. I know he’s joking but I’m not in the mood. Not between my ex showing up and now the weather girl. Why can’t I have a normal day where nothing bothers me?

“Why is she even here?”

Noah looks at me. “Who?”

I shake my head. I’m not sure who I’m referring to, Autumn or Elena. Both of them are in my head and that’s not a good place for either of them to be. Especially right now. I don’t know what it is about Autumn but I need to get her out of my thoughts. In the long run, she’s inconsequential to me. She’s nothing and her presence should not have any effect on me whatsoever. Elena on the other hand, I have to find a way to deal with her and set her straight on the reality course of life—we’re getting a divorce. I’m not going to pretend that she didn’t have an affair and brush it under the rug because she’s had a change of heart.

We won the game, and instead of celebrating with my teammates, I’m hiding out in the training room. I waited until everyone left before getting into an ice bath. I played like shit and needed to numb the stench of feeling like a loser away. Our trainer is chatting away, but I’m not listening. I’m fucking cold, my limbs hurt, and my muscles are tightening up. I need to get out but I’m stubborn and want to make sure the locker room is clear before I head in there.

During the game, Coach ripped my ass. I dropped too many passes, couldn’t complete a route, and ran right into tackles. He asked me one too many times what the hell was wrong with me. I wanted to tell him, but I have a strict “keep home life at home” policy. No one on the team needs to know that I’m bothered by Elena being at the game or how phony she is for the cameras, and they really don’t need to know that being in the same vicinity or hearing Autumn’s name infuriates me to no end. The latter I can’t explain and it’s really bothersome.

The trainer tells me time is up. He’s right, even though I don’t want to admit it. I put my hands down on the top of the tub and push myself up, only to stumble back into the water.

“I knew you were gluttonous for punishment when you got in,” the trainer says as he puts his forearms under my pits and guides me to standing. “You good?”

I nod and step out. I’m shivering and my teeth are chattering. Fuck, am I stupid or what? He hands me a couple towels and tells me to warm up. I could go into the sauna or steam room, but I opt to head to the locker room. At some point, I need to face what’s waiting for me at home. Elena can stay in the apartment with the kids while I get a hotel or something. I know they miss her and the last thing I want to do is take what little time they’re getting with her lately away.