The Girl Who Always Wins (Soulless 13)
Page 55
On Friday, she came home from work. “Thought we could go to my parents’ to celebrate. My brothers still don’t know.”
The high of our engagement had been forgotten after she’d told me the news. I was still happy, still wanted to be with her, but that seemed like old news now. “Sure.” I closed my laptop on the coffee table.
She took the seat beside me, giving me that look.
The same look her dad gave sometimes.
I knew what was coming.
She didn’t even look pregnant. She looked exactly the same. Naked, her stomach was as flat as ever. I hadn’t kissed her belly, hadn’t even acknowledged the existence of our child, because I was afraid to get too attached.
Her hands came together in her lap. “I have doctor appointments this week…if you want to come. But if you don’t, I understand too.”
I wasn’t a coward. Wouldn’t make her go through this alone. “I’ll be there.”
She’d been bracing herself for a different answer, judging by the relief in her eyes. “Maybe we should talk about this…”
There was nothing to talk about. “What do you want me to say, Daisy?”
“I…I don’t know. You’re here, but you aren’t really here, you know?”
I looked away and stared at the dark TV screen.
“Your reaction is much better than I anticipated, but…it’s still a bit hollow.”
I needed to be positive. I needed to be supportive. She couldn’t spend her energy worrying about me. “I can’t pretend that I’m not scared. I’m terrified. I’m afraid to even allow myself to want this because if it doesn’t happen…it’ll hurt so much.”
Her hand went to mine. “I know.”
My fingers intertwined with hers then gave her a tight squeeze. “But we have to hope for the best.” I forced myself to say it, to put that positivity in the air, to make her hope for a better future than the experiences in my past.
“I agree. It could be different this time.”
I nodded. “Yes…it could.”
“And I know I can’t make things happen with just sheer force of will, but you know how I am. I don’t give up. I’m not gonna let our baby give up.”
I looked away because I was about to get choked up. It wasn’t her—it was me. She could try as hard as she wanted, but I was the one who fucked up everything in the end. Her strength wouldn’t balance my weakness. “I know you won’t…”
“Was it always the first trimester when it…?”
“Yes. The very end.”
She nodded. “I’m a third of the way there. So far, so good.”
I forced myself to give a nod. “We’ll make it.” It was so hard to force this shit out, when I was too afraid to even believe it.
She squeezed my hand, like that encouragement meant the world to her.
I turned back to her, seeing the love in her eyes, the fight, the hope.
I could never take that away from her.
When we walked inside, her family was already there.
“Oh man…I’m so tired.” Daisy took off her coat and hung it by the doorway. “Exhausted. Like, I’ve never been this tired in my life…”
Dex eyed her from the couch, about to make a smartass comment. “Not surprised. Saying the same thing over and over again would exhaust anybody. And what about poor Atlas here? He’s the one who has to listen to it—”
“Because I’ve been carrying around this mountain everywhere!” Daisy held up her left hand.
Dex immediately dropped his sarcasm and jumped to his feet. He threw his arms up in the air. “No way!”
Emerson came over and examined Daisy’s left hand. “Wow, it’s gorgeous.”
“Thank you,” Daisy said. “Picked it out myself.”
I shrugged. “I just bought it.”
Emerson opened her arms and hugged me. “Welcome to the family.”
I hugged her back. “Thanks.”
Dex grabbed Daisy’s wrist and examined it. “Damn…that’s nice. Congratulations.” He smiled then hugged his sister, hugged her for a really long time, dropping his sarcastic remarks and enveloping her in older brother affection.
Derek came to me and gave me a hug. “You’re sure about this?”
I chuckled. “Yes.”
“Because she’s just going to get worse with age.”
“Nothing I can’t handle.”
Derek patted me on the arm. “You’re a good man. And you’re good to my sister.”
“Thanks, Derek.”
Derek moved to his sister next and hugged her.
Sicily came next and hugged me, holding her youngest in one arm.
He was really cute, and I swallowed at the sight of him.
It would be so nice to have a little kid at the end of this, with dark hair like ours, with her eyes.
Can’t do that, man.
Mrs. Hamilton came next, hugging me like she was my mom, not my future mother-in-law. “That’s a beautiful ring, Atlas.”
“A beautiful girl needs a beautiful ring.”
“Good answer. So happy that my little girl has found the right man for her.”
“Thank you, Mrs. Hamilton.”
She rolled her eyes. “Please call me Cleo. Everyone knows who I’m married to, so I don’t need the title.”