Her heart beat faster. She was beginning to understand what made this man worry. What hurt him. “Hush.” She kept her strokes even and light. “I’ll take you to my old cottage someday and then you can put all this worry to rest.”
He relaxed at those words, his body pressing more closely to hers. “Thank you for being here.”
“Thank you for letting me, Will.” She brushed her cheek along his. “I want ye to know that it doesn’t matter where we are or how the crop comes out. You need to understand, Will, you are a man that provides. It’s obvious to anyone who meets you. I’ve known it from the first day…well the second day I’d met you.” She continued lightly touching him. “So try not to worry so much and let me help you with this one. I can.”
He leaned back, looking into her eyes. “Can you really? It’s not that I don’t believe you, it’s that I am honestly struggling to understand how.”
He didn’t mean it as insult. “I’ve worked hard my entire life. As soon as the rain stops, I’ll join you in the field.”
“The children. What would we do with them?” he asked.
She took a breath, the words hard to push out. “They’ll stay with Mary while I work.” She knew it was a sensible plan but it meant she’d have to see the woman. Will needed her and if she was going to prove to him she could be relied upon, give him what he needed, she’d have to swallow her pride. It was time.
“Mary?” He propped up on one elbow, his gaze unblinking. “Are you sure about that?”
“I’ll do it for you, Will.” She rose up too. “This isn’t about my past.” She took a deep breath. “It’s about your future.”
“It’s about our future.” He pressed his mouth to hers. “Together.”
“Will.” Her tone was clipped. She didn’t want to say the truth but if she lied now, telling him the truth would only be more painful. “I’ve already told you. I’m not the woman you want. I can’t give you a future.”
“Not tonight, Gemma,” he lay back down. “We’ll discuss this in the morning.”
She nodded. She was going to have to tell him soon. “Whom did you write to?”
“Blair.” He covered his eyes with his arm. “I need help and it’s time I asked fer it.” Then he pulled down his arm, his jaw tense. “Because our future is important to me.”
Gemma lay down too, her stomach roiling with emotion. He didn’t understand but he would. His future was important to her too. More important, in all honesty, than her own.
Chapter Seventeen
The next morning, they headed out to the fields. On their way, Will sent his only stable worker to deliver the message to Blair. “He says that I have a hard time asking for help and I guess he’s right.” Will grimaced, his mouth pulling down as the man rode away. “Feels like I’ve failed.”
“You haven’t. Not yet and not by asking for help, Will.” She took his hand. He was a strong man but he didn’t have to be everything to everyone. “Let’s go. The sooner we start, the more we’ll get done.”
He gave her a smile. “Thank ye, love.”
Love. The word washed over her making her heart swell in her chest. She loaded Ewan and Fiona in the wagon and they set out for Mary’s croft.
Her feelings held her until the little farmhouse came into view. Then she caught her breath. Sean had lived there with his other wife. Somehow, though, the same feelings of resentment didn’t surface. If Sean hadn’t left, she never would have ended up here. She’d never have met someone who really loved her.
That made her blink with surprise. Looking over at Will, she reached for his hand.
“Are ye all right?” he asked, his baritone warming her further.
“I’m absolutely fine. Better than that even.” She gave him a nod.
His eyebrows rose up. “I didn’t expect to hear that.”
Leaning close to him, she placed her cheek on his shoulder. “If not for what Sean did, I would never have met you.”
“When you talk like that, it makes me think that ye’re considering a future with me after all.”
She sat up then. “Will, it’s not that I don’t want you for my own…” But her words died as a woman stepped out on the porch holding a babe on her hip and a little one by the hand. “Mary.”
“Aye,” Will replied. “That’s Mary.”
As they moved closer, she could see the woman’s brown hair and classic features. She was a beauty, there was no doubt, but dark circles under her eyes made her look tired and beaten down.