“No.”
She purses her lips, obviously wanting to tell me something, but not sure she should say it. She doesn’t like pushing me. I don’t know if it’s because Enzo threatened her, or if she just realizes if she pushes she might lose any progress we have made.
“What?” I ask.
“I was thinking about your sleep. Sleep is the most important part of your healing process. Of course, I would like you to eat more. I would like you to take more medication and get some x-rays done. But if I had to choose one thing to focus on for you, it would be sleep.”
I sigh. “I can’t control when my nightmares come or how much sleep I get. And I won’t take anything. It doesn’t make me feel safe.”
She nods. “I’m not asking you to take anything.”
“Then what are you asking?”
“I’m asking if there is anything that would make sleeping safer for you?”
I look at her wide-eyed. I’m pretty sure there is something, although I would never ask for him. I’m not even sure if it was a dream or reality. But the first few nights I was here and slept for hours uninterrupted, Enzo slept with me. He held my body all night, keeping me warm without overpowering me. I’ve never slept so peacefully, but maybe it was just because I was so exhausted and it had nothing to do with him.
“Maybe a stronger lock on the door would help you? Blackout curtains? Sleep during the daylight and staying awake at night, if that is more what you are used to. Take a relaxing bath before you sleep. All I ask is that you try to get more sleep. It’s the most important thing for your body to heal.”
“I will try.”
“Good, thank you.”
Miranda studies me a second longer. “For what it’s worth, Kai, you are healing. Your cheeks are filling back out into light shades of pink, your eyes aren’t empty holes anymore, and you have fat and muscle returning to your body. I know the healing process can be frustratingly slow, but be patient with yourself. You will get better. And you will heal in ways you didn’t even realize you needed healing—just be patient.”
I nod.
She stands. “If you need anything at all, give me a call. Mr. Westcott has my number. Otherwise, I’ll come back in a couple of days.”
Miranda doesn’t wait for a goodbye or acknowledgment from me at all. She leaves without expectation of a hug or a handshake or a verbal goodbye. I like her as much as I can like a person, which isn’t much, but I’m thankful to have someone watching over me and ensuring that I’m healing. Albeit slowly and on my own terms.
I lean my head back against the wall. I know what comes next, and I’m not sure I can handle it. I wish everyone were as gentle and understanding as the doctor.
A loud tapping rattles the door.
I don’t have to welcome him in, he just enters.
“Good morning, Miss Miller,” Westcott says with a large tray of food.
“It’s Kai,” I say for the millionth time.
He ignores me and sets the tray on the nightstand.
“I brought you pancakes, eggs, bacon, sausage, and toast. There is also a side of fruit. A smoothie, yogurt, and orange juice. And then I brought you both coffee and tea since I wasn’t sure which you preferred and you still haven’t told me.” He looks resentful.
I haven’t told him because I don’t even know which one I prefer. Not anymore.
“Would you like to eat out on the balcony today? It’s a beautiful day. It would be a shame to waste the sunshine. Vitamin D is essential for healing you know.”
I frown. If it were so important, then the doctor would have recommended it.
He sighs when I don’t answer and lifts the tray to set it down on the spot on the floor next to me, knowing this is the only way he’ll get any food in me, if it’s within my reach.
I take a piece of the bacon off the plate and start nib
bling on it. Its probably not the best for my stomach, but it tastes good.
“Is there anything else I can get or arrange for you today?” he asks.