Not Sorry

I nod as Sean undoes the buttons on my coat and pushes it off.

“You want me to touch you like he never did?”

I nod as Sean undoes the button and zipper on his pants.

“You want me to make you scream like Owen never could?”

“Yes,” I breathe.

Sean takes his cock out of his pants and holds it in his hand. He pulls a condom out of his back pocket and slips it on while he stares at me the whole time.

Sean grabs my pajama pants and pulls them down hard, and I squeal just a little bit. And then I bite my lip when I realize I was far too loud for what we are about to do.

“Don’t bite your lip. I want to hear every dirty moan.”

He grabs my legs and spreads them wide. He buries his face between them. His tongue makes me forget about how angry I was just a second ago. I try to keep my senses about me to remain quiet because, even now, I don’t want to get hurt. I don’t want to become a monster, and that’s what I’ll feel like if I scream and make what we’re doing in Owen’s bed apparent.

But that’s not an option.

Sean’s tongue is moving faster than I ever remember him moving it before. He slides a finger into my pussy and then another and another, stretching me wide, while his other hand slips under my top until it finds my nipple, flicking across it.

The sensation is too much for me to contain, so I scream, “Fuck, more!”

But Sean stops as soon as I say more. “You don’t get to come without me inside you. He needs to know exactly what I can do to you.”

Sean pushes his cock inside me, and I grab his face, meeting his lips to try to keep my moaning at bay. But Sean only kisses me once on the lips, and then his lips move to my neck. His lips kiss up and down my neck and then nibble on my ear as he continues to affect me.

“I want to hear you scream my name.”

He thrusts harder, fucking me harder and harder into the bed. I’ve never been fucked this hard or this fast before in my life, but it makes me want to have sex like this again and again. Harder, faster, like animals.

“Scream my name, Olive,” Sean says again.

He fucks me harder and faster, to a level that I didn’t know existed, until I can barely breathe or think. Until all I can do is scream.

“Sean!” I scream as I come, clawing my nails into his back.

He continues to fuck me hard and fast, each thrust harder, until he thrusts one last time, coming inside me with a force I’ve never felt before.

Just as I’m about to take a breath, I hear a loud pop, and then the bed collapses to the floor. I scream again as Sean’s arms protectively wrap around me as we fall to the floor.

I look up at Sean, and we both laugh at the bed that is now in a collapsed mess on the floor.

“Milo!” I say, looking around for my cat, hoping to God that he wasn’t under the bed in his usual hiding place.

Sean rolls off me and begins cleaning himself up while I pull my pants up. I run, searching around the room for my cat. I open the closet door and find him trapped inside, lying in the corner of the closet. I smile as I pick him up and cuddle him in my arms. He meows and nuzzles his head up against my face, happy to see me.

I look back at Sean as he pulls his pants back up. I just had him, but I want him again. Now. I take a deep breath, hoping that feeling will pass, but it only intensifies as I look at him. My headache is gone, and I feel alive for the first time since he last fucked me. He’s turned me into a sex-craving lunatic.

But it’s not just the sex that I want. I want him. I want the guy who, even while he was trying to keep his distance, still took care of me. If he can do that while pretending not to care, I want to know what it’s like for him to truly care about somebody.

Damn it, what has he done to me?

13

Sean

What the fuck have I done?