Not Sorry

Olive

Sean never made it to my apartment last night. He stayed at Margo’s hotel, speaking with her employees most of the night, working out a new contract with them.

But he did call to apologize. Twice.

And I’m beginning to love hearing him apologize.

I can’t wait to get into work today. Because it means that I will get to see Sean again. And, hopefully, now that the Margo account has been settled, we can get back into a normal swing of work, which will involve lots of sneaking around in his office to have sex.

So, I jump out of bed thirty minutes before my alarm even goes off, far too excited to get into work today. I jump in and out of the shower even faster. I throw on some clothes, but when it comes to doing my hair and makeup, I take a little more time then usual.

I want Sean to find me irresistible. I want him to not be able to think straight because all he can think about is me.

Milo brushes up against me while I finish applying my makeup. I pet him, giving him the attention he wants.

My phone buzzes, and I see the message is from Sean. I smile as I open the text message, and immediately, my heart sinks.

Sean: I have to go to NYC for a week. Margo wants me to personally find her new property there to assure her that we can honor our new contract.

I frown. I don’t get to see him today. I don’t get to kiss him.

Is he running away from me?

I immediately push the thought out of my head. He’s not running away at the thought of a serious relationship with me. He’s not hiding. He’s just working, doing what’s right.

Still, it doesn’t keep me from feeling horrible. I wish I could see him again before he goes.

It’s a silly thought. I just saw him yesterday. There is no need to be so needy.

I take a deep breath trying to keep from letting the thought of him not being at work today make me fall apart. It’s probably better actually that he won’t be at work today. It will help keep people from getting suspicious about our relationship and it will allow me to start being respected as a leader without him here.

I text back.

Me: I’m going to miss you. Good luck!

He doesn’t respond immediately. I try to distract myself by finishing getting ready, but that is no longer a distraction for me. I no longer care about what I look like when I get into work or getting in early.

I sulk while I finish getting ready. I do my best to take my time now that I don’t have Sean to look forward to. But I quickly run out of things to do at home. I might as well get into work early. It will at least distract me.

I head downstairs. I decide to call an Uber when I see more than a foot of snow covering the ground. Sean and I never discussed what my new salary would be, but it has to be enough for me to at least afford an occasional Uber ride to work instead of taking the subway every morning.

I wait in the lobby until the Uber pulls up, and then I step out into the cold air, happy that I have the new coat that Sean bought for me to keep me warm and remind me of him on a day like today.

“You didn’t think I would leave without saying good-bye first, did you?” I hear Sean’s voice cut through the cool air.

I grin and turn around to see Sean walking toward me.

I run over to him, throwing myself in his arms like I haven’t seen him in months instead of only hours. He catches me and wraps his arms around me like he is just as desperate for me as I am for him.

He firmly kisses me over and over, turning the kiss into a longer make-out session.

I slowly pull away. “You are full of surprises,” I say.

Sean smiles and then walks me over to one of two cars parked along the street.

“Your chariot, fully stocked with coffee and chocolate chip cookies to get you through your day,” Sean says.

“You go