“I love you so much, Nina. I’m never going to let you go again,” Heath says.
“I know all you want to do is fuck her, Heath, but good luck getting me to let her go anytime soon,” Eden says.
We all laugh.
“I love you both so much. Let’s go home,” I say.
I do love them both, but I also can’t help but think of the two other men I also love. Men I love just because they saved me. That’s it. It will eventually disappear. I just need to get back to normal. Whatever that is. Then, my love for them will fade while my love for Heath and Eden takes over.
* * *
“You can fuck me harder than that,” I say as I roll off of Heath.
He sighs. “I don’t know how I can fuck you much harder than that, Nina, without hurting you.”
“You won’t hurt me. But I like it rough.”
“I know, but all I think about when I have rough sex with you is what you must have gone through.”
I frown. “Maybe I want you to erase those memories by making new, darker ones.”
“What if I can’t erase them?” he asks.
I exhale. It’s the fifth time he’s asked me that in the last six months. My wounds have mostly healed, but it’s clear that Heath’s have not. I know I should be just as patient with him as he is with me, but it’s hard. I’m ready to live life to the fullest while he is more cautious than ever before.
I hear a knock on the door and groan. Heath gives me a look that tells me to be nice, but I still grumble as I grab a robe and walk to the door.
“Yes, Jeffrey,” I say to the most cautious member of my security team.
“I heard a loud noise and wanted to check and make sure you were okay, ma’am.”
I sigh. “I’m clearly fine. Heath and I were having sex. You don’t have to check on me when I’m having sex. We’ve already had this conversation.”
“I’m sorry, ma’am. It won’t happen again. Have a good night.”
“Good night, Jeffrey,” I say, closing the door before taking off my robe and heading back to bed. “Are you sure we can’t hire someone else?” I ask, climbing back into bed with Heath.
“He’s the best.”
“He’s overly cautious, and I can’t do anything. I don’t feel normal.”
Heath frowns. “The only thing that matters to me is that you are always safe. I can’t lose you again. You’re too important to me.”
I nod. “Snuggle with me.”
Heath obliges me, wrapping his arms around me as the conversation ends. Within minutes, Heath is asleep while I do everything to stay awake, thinking about my new life. A life where I feel almost as trapped as I did at the Carini mansion. Trapped by Heath’s worries. Trapped by my own security team.
The only place I can escape is in my dreams. Dreams I shouldn’t be having. But they are t
he only place where I feel free.
* * *
“You aren’t happy,” Eden says as she munches on her pizza.
“Of course I’m happy. I’m with a man I love. I’m safe. What more could I need?”
“Heath isn’t happy either.”