Knight swallowed and traced the patch with his fingertip. He vaguely remembered how resentful he’d sometimes been because of the responsibilities that came with the title. But at the same time he enjoyed being the center of attention. He liked dealing with people and succeeding at securing a good outcome for his club.
“Didn’t work out so well last time, huh?”
“You got distracted. You two summoned the ghost, things went to shit, and you were trying to protect him. Believe me, I get it.” Beast shook his head with a deep breath, and he was surely thinking about Laurent. “But I saw that since then you’ve learned to communicate more clearly, so maybe now you’ll know we’re not here to fuck up your relationship. We help each other. That’s what the Kings of Hell are about. Protecting and supporting our brothers and their families.”
Knight’s chest was heavy as if a stone had suddenly materialized inside his body. “Ah, we broke up,” he said, feeling compelled to smile.
Beast didn’t. “The fuck?”
Knight groaned and leaned back in the chair. “What do you want me to say?”
“Tell me how do you take on a lifelong pact for someone and break up the next day? That’s what I want you to tell me.” Beast clenched his fist on the table. “If you weren’t that into him after all, we should have shipped him off to Brecon, or wherever, and saved you the goddamn hassle!”
Knight’s entire skin burned. “He broke up with me yesterday. Do you think I just got afraid of the commitment and chose to wing it after last night? What the fuck?”
Beast’s glare became dark. “After all that, he fucked you over? Let’s go pay the motherfucker a visit, because this is bullshit! I don’t care how ‘fragile’ he is. He needs to learn some fucking manners!”
Knight clenched his teeth so hard it made his jaw ache. “Why do you always assume the worst about Elliot? It’s like you’re trying to find an excuse to get back at him for summoning Fane!”
Beast groaned. “Fine. Let’s just forget about Elliot as you fulfil your duties to the fucking devil until the end of your life. Fine. Are you gonna be my VP or not? It’s your choice, Knight. Will you just fuck about and do what you’re told, or are you ready to take on greater responsibility?” He tapped the patch. “This is a commitment, and I may make it sound like it’s a life sentence, but it’s not. Some days I’m tired with everything I have to be in charge of, but it’s also a source of pride. We all work together to create good lives for every brother and those he holds dear. It’s not a prison. It’s a great joy. But you have to choose it for yourself, otherwise you won’t understand.”
Knight took a deep breath and stared at the patch, feeling hot and cold at the same time, as if Beast had dropped him into an icy river. It sounded like a relationship pep talk. In a way, Knight was already married to the club, forever tied to his chosen brothers. He’d always been loyal and tried to do everything in his power to support their common operation. Beast was right, the responsibility would come with more problems but also with more control. It would allow him to be in the midst of things and always support his prez when it mattered. For the club, he was ready to give up a great many things.
“I know responsibility. I promised him I would save him, and him breaking up things between us didn’t matter. I wanted to do this for him. Just like I’m willing to work for the club, even if it’s not always a bed of roses,” he said and grabbed the patch with a sense of finality.
Beast’s lips curved into that partial smile so typical of him. “I’m happy to see you stepping up, Knight. We will all make sure you get to fulfil your duty to him no matter what, just like all the Kings support me. You will see that there’s nothing better than to have others depend on you and you satisfying their expectations. We might all live outside of society, but we’ve created our own, and there’s great freedom in that, even if that means we have to work for it.”
Knight leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table. The patch was crumpled in his fist when he looked at it, following the sudden trickle of red hot thoughts burning their way through his brain.
He loved his freedom, but that didn’t mean responsibility or commitment were bad for him. Could he ever enjoy his many one-nighters as much as he’d enjoyed his time with Elliot? Either way, he would be losing something.
Beast gave him an encouraging pat on the shoulder. “Don’t look so miserable. You know how to do this job already, you’ve been a part of this club since we were kids. Sure, you will have to take care of shit when necessary, but you’ve done that many times before. You and I will be a great team.”