“What is it? I’ll do it.” Ned tried to kiss Cole’s aching fingers, but Cole managed to pull away in time, and untied Ned’s wrists as well.
“Dress up for the snow,” he said and stepped away so Ned wouldn’t try touching him again. Life had proved how weak he was, and he wouldn’t leave things to chance this time.
There was a stiffness to Ned’s moves, but he proceeded to do as told, so Cole went on.
“We will fight until you tell me what I want to know. Or you die. Or I die. Whichever’s first.”
Ned was putting on a fur hat when he looked back at Cole with his mouth slack. He resembled the man Cole had once loved so much, that watching him was unbearable. “You can’t be serious. Cole. Aren’t we past that? I know you must be hurting over losing the man you loved, but—”
“I didn’t love him!” Cole snapped. “Love is just temporary insanity that makes people do things they normally wouldn’t. You were the one to prove that to me. It’s been seven years, and I don’t even feel like myself anymore. I’m done living like this. So if you want to help me, let’s settle this once and for all.” He opened the door to make his intentions clear.
“But… we just made love,” Ned muttered, but moved when Cole pushed him forward and slammed the door in front of Dog’s muzzle, so the beast wouldn’t follow.
“I don’t believe in love. I had an itch, and you wanted me too, so we fucked. That’s all that happened,” Cole said, because sometimes truth hurt too much, and it was easier to lie.
The sky was getting darker, but there was still enough light for what he intended. He walked Ned to the open hole next to Lars’s burial and pointed at it in the glow of the kerosene lamp resting between the two graves. “If I lose, have the decency to bury me here. And don’t let Dog chew at me.”
Ned raised his arms with his face scrunched into a scowl. “I can’t do this, Cole. I won’t hit you.”
“Then die or tell me everything!” Cole said and charged at him, knocking into Ned like a crazed bull. The world spun as they landed, and the dense snow trapped Ned under Cole, holding him captive for that first punch.
“Don’t make me! I don’t want to remember!” Ned raised his arm to block the next strike, but wasn’t engaging the way Cole needed him to, so Cole hit his stomach next in hopes that would do the trick.
“You owe me the truth. You used me to destroy my family! You lied to my face for months! Speak or break my neck, so we can finally be done with this,” he roared while the faint glow of the lamp trembled on Ned’s face.
“You don’t understand what I’ve been through!”
But Cole was getting somewhere, because Ned pushed him back at last. He laughed, burning with a high that transformed the ache in his limbs and back into fuel for his anger. His fist smashed against Ned’s chin, making his head bounce.
“No, you don’t understand. I gave you everything I had! I was ready to give up on who I was. For you! And you ruined it,” he screamed, agitated by the way Ned twisted away and covered his head rather than trying to fight back.
Where was his spirit? Where was the drive that had fueled his attack on Tom?
“Cole, please. Stop,” Ned begged, but despite stiffening between Cole’s thighs each time fists collided with flesh, he didn’t try to shove him off or fight back, instead curling up like a defenseless child.
The strength in his arms was wasted on him.
Cole’s lips trembled, and his throat burned as if he’d just drank acid. “Goddamn you! Tell me! Tell me why you’ve done it!”
The trees, the snow, the dusky sky above, and the walls of Ned’s home spun around him ever faster, causing his stomach to clench. A dark laugh rumbled nearby, deep under the disturbed soil, as if Lars were mocking him even in death. Or was it just the dog barking in the house?
Glinting spots filled Cole’s vision as he shook Ned, roaring at the top of his lungs.
He couldn’t stand this anymore.
“I trusted you! I loved you. But I will kill you if that’s what you want rather than talking!”
With a sharp cry, he rolled Ned to his back and, seeing him curl both arms around his head, went for the unprotected neck. Ned’s hands fell to the sides, and he stared back at Cole with bloodshot eyes.
“I’m sorry—”
“That’s not good enough!”
Cole squeezed Ned’s throat and rose to apply more pressure as Ned grabbed at his forearms, trying to break the hold rather than shove Cole off. Well-rested and strong, he could have done it. But Ned didn’t try to fight Cole even as he started wheezing, and shut his eyes, trembling in fear and agony.