The Man Who Hated Ned O'Leary (Dig Two Graves 2)

“Might be a good place for him with the six fingers and all. Folk outside of our little world don’t accept different.” Roger shook his head. “My folks wanted to keep me away from people. Wouldn’t let me go to town or be around when guests came over,” he said, eating very slowly, as if he didn’t want to offend Cole with the sight of food in the exposed part of his mouth.

“That’s… terrible,” Cole said. “But I am worried about that too. It’s just his fingers, but I’ve heard stories from people who don’t quite fit in. I don’t want him to go through that.”

Discussing Tommy took his mind off Ned at least. Was he still in the old factory, contemplating where to go next? How did he take the letter? Did it hurt him, or had he been relieved?

“And he don’t talk neither. You made the right call leaving him here. This might not be the best place for kids, but Judith’s a caring woman, and he’s got a chance for a good life with us. So Ned’s washed his hands of the boy?”

An invisible grip tightened on Cole’s throat. “I took the choice from him.”

“Not pretty, that fight you had…” Roger muttered, and it felt as if he was trying to pry Cole open with an oyster knife.

“It’ll be better that way,” Cole said in a tight voice and slowly spread his fingers, trying to relieve the strain in them. “I told him I hated him. In front of everyone. We’ll never see each other again.”

Roger nodded, pretending he couldn’t look away from his burnt carrot porridge. “Oh, I’ve heard, but it’s also not what I heard in your voice…”

It was none of Roger’s business what Cole did or didn’t feel in his heart. Then again, hadn’t Cole just witnessed the kind of meat grinder others put Roger through, because they considered him too ugly for a pretty young wife?

Cole had another sip of coffee, so tense he had to put all his strength into not letting the cup shake. “How do you deal with comments like the ones I’ve just heard? If it was me, they’d both be nursing broken noses.”

Roger sighed. “Sometimes I lash out too, but that’s what they want, so I refuse to give it to them. They can think me a fool or a cuckold. Only I know what’s between me and Parita.”

Cole fought himself on this one. How was he to answer Roger without offending him? With all the gossip about her, how could the man trust her so blindly?

“You’re really unafraid that she’ll stray one day?”

Roger smirked, stirring his remaining porridge. The man’s heart was softer than his tough exterior suggested, but perhaps that was what made him capable of happiness? “Listen, Cole. Love is like letting someone point a gun at your heart and hoping they’ll never pull the trigger. And I can sure tell you my Parita is a loaded gun. There’s always danger, but where would I be without trust? I’d be a jealous prick keeping her from doing what she loves. I gotta hope her feelings are as strong as mine.”

Cole leaned back, struck by the truth behind Roger’s words. His doubts and worries had never been challenged so directly. Both he and Ned were blinded by emotion when it came to their past, but an outsider like Roger was capable of seeing things more clearly and, like a stick of dynamite, he blew up the walls Cole had erected around his heart.

Cole’s grudge wasn’t rational. He might’ve called all people cheats, but in truth, not all of them were. It was easier to hide in the woods forever than face the loaded gun beyond the trees. That was what the scuffle by the bonfire had been all about. Ned had confronted him, opened his heart in front of everyone, and Cole had bitten his hand and run off, like a dog that had been kicked one time too many. No wonder Ned was done with him after the horrible, vulgar things Cole had told him in front of a crowd.

He’d been a coward who’d rather leave behind the one person who’d made him truly happy than risk that they’d pull the trigger.

“He betrayed me once. It’s hard to forget that it happened.”

Roger frowned. “What? Who? Ned? He was unfaithful?”

Cole scowled. “No. It was… something else. He wasn’t who I thought he was, and because of this—I have the brand because of this,” he said, because Roger had definitely seen it during Cole’s time with the troupe. “And he’d been so sweet back then. How am I supposed to believe it won’t happen again?” he asked as his insides twisted, forcing him to bend forward for relief.

“He was willing to fight for you and lost. But looks like you both got wounds out of it. Only you can decide if he’s worth the risk. Love’s a dangerous thing, but where would we be without it?” Roger patted Cole’s shoulder but his eyes were already trailing after Parita who walked their way in a plain cotton dress, which she’d paired with a long, beaded shawl draped about her form. She looked radiant even with messy hair and a steaming bowl in her hand.