But since Adam Wild had snitched, he could not be trusted in the hands of the law, nor with freedom. If he revealed secrets once, they’d never be safe with him.
A few days on, the loot Adam had saved for the sake of the woman he loved lined Tom’s pockets, and she might never find out what happened to her lover, and that he hadn’t abandoned her.
Instead of blaming Cole, Ned should have tried to talk to him about the murder no matter the state of their friendship, but he failed even at that.
“Zebediah,” Bertha called out from the front of the chuck wagon ahead. “Come on, I’ve got somethin’ nice for you!”
It seemed Zeb wasn’t the only one willing to make amends for whatever argument they’d had last night. He wiggled his brows at Ned, smoothed his whiskers, and sped up to join his lady friend. Those two fought all the time but shared real fondness and always made up. That would end once Ned went through with his plan. Bertha would see Zeb swing, and it struck Ned that he’d be the one to take away her future.
He shouldn’t feel sorry for anyone in the gang, since those who didn't pull triggers still profited from the crimes, but getting to know those people, getting all personal with them and learning their stories turned the previously sharp boundary between good and evil murky. But at the end of the day, Zeb had helped Tom subdue Ned’s father. And he deserved what was coming for him.
But what would happen to Ned once it was all over and the three Gotham Boys who’d killed Ned’s parents lay dead in their graves? His remaining family turned their backs on him, and he had no friends to speak of. No one beside Cole, who no longer wanted to see his face. Without Cole at his side, Ned was alone in this harsh new world, even though he was adjusting far quicker than he would have liked. Left at the back, he sank into grim thoughts of staying lonely forever, with no one to understand what he’d been through or why.
As if to annoy him further, Craw trotted over on his bay mare and offered Ned a wide smile, tipping his stupid bowler hat in greeting. They were riding through prairie with trees scattered only here and there, so who the fuck wore a bowler here? The thing barely had a brim, so it didn’t come as a surprise the guy was redder than usual.
“Hey there, Tessa, you got some water to spare?” Craw asked one of the girls traveling on the wagon. She stood up, holding on to the barrels. Her black curly hair and a big nose were supposedly signs of her Greek heritage. She told that to anyone who’d listen, and to make that her trademark, she fashioned her dresses with a brooch on one side, leaving one shoulder scandalously bare. Too bad she wasn’t Spartan. Maybe she’d have bitten off Craw’s parts and made him useless for Cole.
“Why, I do,” she said, leaning out of the wagon with a teasing smile. “Is thirst bothering you much?”
Craw winked at her and handed over two canteens, one of which—decorated with the silhouette of a bull’s head in leather—Ned recognized as Cole’s. “No river in sight, and we need watering.”
That was it. A man could only take so much. “You riding with Cole?” Ned asked and urged his horse closer.
Craw nodded and pulled out a cigarette, which might have been one of his own, but it looked awfully like the ones Cole rolled for himself. “Yes, we’re at the front. He’d been singing that strange song he’d learned from Norwegian miners. You know, the one with all the strange Rs?”
Of course Ned knew it. He’d been there and had learned it too. He even had a whistle to go with it and had thought of it as a memory that was theirs and didn’t need to be shared with others. “Don’t recall it,” he said through the fire burning at the end of his tongue.
Ned itched to ride up to Cole and… and what? What claim did he have on Cole’s friendship?
There was no denying it. He was jealous. Jealous like a hungry bear awakened mid-winter to smell pork roasted with honey in a human settlement while he was out there in the snow, ravenous and miserable.
“Cole should come get his water himself. You’re not his errand boy,” Ned said, knowing damn well that the manipulation attempt was low and vile.
But Craw smiled as Tessa passed him the canteens. “I don’t mind. It’s a long trip and there’s not all that much to do. Thanks, m’am.” He couldn’t tip his hat with his hands full, so he nodded instead and rode off, leaving Ned to his frustration.