Not really, because every time he tried to not think about it, he saw the scene unravel in explicit detail. Him. In Caspian’s body. So small and helpless. Trapped under a man twice his size. A strong, massive hand against his throat. The other holding his wrist down. And a big dick he knew all too well pressing against him through thick denim.
Gunner curled his toes and laid back in the bedding with a soft groan. Was he still hard or had he just gotten another erection? He wasn’t sure and it didn’t matter, because he was alone and no one needed to know what he was about to do. He pushed down the blanket to look down the body he was yet to discover. While slim, Caspian definitely worked out in one way or another, because his muscles had a hint of definition. But Gunner’s one-track mind led him straight down the treasure trail of hairs, to the cock resting on a bed of dark pubes. While indeed on the small side, the shaft had some girth, and Gunner wrapped his slim fingers around it, both horny and confused by how different it felt in his hand in comparison to the thick sausage he was used to carrying in his pants.
And unlike his, Caspian’s prick was uncut.
Would there be any difference in how it felt to the touch? He spat in his hand for good measure, too horny to search for lube, and flushed when his fingers pulled on the soft hood, exposing the head. He rubbed the tip, like usual, but the sensation felt almost too intense, so he touched the damp slit and only then glided the digit around while his balls heated. Small tingles trailed up the backs of his legs as he let his head fall back, drawn to the scary moment when the hulking body had stretched over him.
The memory of his own face staring back at him with anger burning in eyes he so often saw in the mirror was a bit of a cold shower, so he replaced it with another one. Mike Choi was the sole gay man Gunner knew, and he too was seriously ripped, with massive guns for arms and pecs like huge, juicy steaks. Yeah. This would work.
Mike straddling him and opening his pants to present his firm dick. He was a no-nonsense kind of guy, and he’d show Gunner his place by shoving that stiff tool down his throat from the get-go.
Gunner had never tried using any toys to play with his hole. It didn't feel right, even if he were to plan going somewhere truly private for such an experiment. He was afraid he’d like it too much, that it would change how he perceived himself, and he shouldn’t want to get dicked in the first place. But was it something he should try now? No longer constricted by who he ought to be or what he should represent, could he explore a part of himself he never dared to acknowledge?
Maybe. He'd need to find out if he had it in him.
For now, he was far too engrossed in the fantasy of submitting to another man to bother working out the technicalities of anal.
He glanced down his smooth chest and pinched one of the pink nipples, imagining not the real Gunner, but this body being teased and grabbed by a hot, muscular guy like Mike Choi. For once, he didn’t want to close his eyes and drift off while jerking off. He wanted to see every detail of his own trembling thighs, tiny feet and slim fingers around a cock that barely peeked from out of his clenched fist when he stroked it.
His toes curled when he imagined the weight of Mike’s hand on his head, the scent of male arousal, and above all—the cock forcing its way past Gunner’s gag reflex. It would move, caressing him from the inside, and within moments he’d be red-faced and damp with spit, but he’d let Mike use him however he pleased anyway.
To be desired like this, touched, rubbed and squeezed, was a need that always penetrated Gunner’s secret fantasies. He moved his hand over the pulsing cock, raising his hips as the lewd scene playing in his head intensified and the imaginary balls met his chin.
Heat flashed through his body, and as phantom cum splashed down his throat, the scent of his own filled the air, and he shivered with pleasure, rocking in the middle of the bed until his balls dried.
He lay in the soft sheets for a while. This was exactly what he needed to take the edge off after confronting Caspian. It would had been amazing to take a nap, but he wasn’t sure how much time he’d be given in this body, so he intended to make the best of this fuckery. He just needed to make sure he stayed away from fights.