She stepped quickly to him and retrieved the child from his arms, not lingering quite as long during the transaction this time. Elizabeth passed the baby to the maid, who turned to leave but then seemed to remember something else. “Oh, and Lord and Lady Kensworth are waiting for you in the foyer. They are ready to take their leave.”
Elizabeth nodded, and the maid curtsied—which felt somehow more impressive and unnecessary with a child in her arms—and then she was gone, leaving Oliver and Elizabeth alone again.
Words. He needed to say something. Anything to draw out this moment and make his time with her last a little longer. “Is Kate recovered yet? Will the duke and duchess be able to come meet their new grandson?”
Her shoulders slumped. “No. Carver just received a letter this morning saying that Kate is recovered but Mama and Papa have now contracted the fever. They are both quite ill.”
“Oh, that’s too bad.”
“Yes.”
“I will remember them in my prayers.”
She smiled. “Thank you.”
Elizabeth seemed to be feeling the same need to draw out their time together as well. Her eyes looked as if they were physically searching for a topic of conversation. Finally, he and Elizabeth both started speaking at the same time, but her words caught his ear and made him stop talking first. “What was that?” he asked, both wanting and dreading her confirmation of what he thought he’d heard.
Her eyes darted to her skirts that she had begun fidgeting with the folds. “The Dowager Lady Hastings has invited me to come to attend her house party next week.” His mind raced with the implication of that statement.
“Is…Lord Hastings going to be in attendance as well?”
Her eyes met his. “I don’t believe I would have been invited if he was not expected to attend as well.” His stomach twisted. Hastings's suit was more serious than he had realized.
“And…are you planning to accept the invitation?”
There was a pause before she blinked and clasped her hands in front of her. “Should I?” She was asking him to make this decision for her? Why? But somehow, he knew that answer.
She loves me.
It felt as if two different paths physically formed in front of him. His heart longed for her. His arms ached to pull her close to him and hold her. He could tell her not to go. He could tell her of his feelings and beg her to ch
oose him.
Or…
He could make sure she was protected.
“You should go,” he said, choosing to let Elizabeth have the life she deserved. A life with a man who would be constant for her, free of baggage and heartache. He would never trust himself with loving her. But Hastings would take care of her, boring though he may be.
Elizabeth nodded. “I will then.” He saw her swallow before pasting that fake smile on her face. “I wasn’t sure until now, but…you’re right. I should go. And who knows”—a tremble ran through her voice—“maybe this will end up being the start to my forever with Lord Hastings.”
He felt as if his heart had just been ripped from his chest.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Elizabeth kept her eyes fixed outside the window as the carriage rolled away from Hatley House. Never in her wildest dreams could she have imagined the sort of afternoon she had just had. Her mind bounced from remembering the agony of childbirth her sister had withstood, to her own bravery in delivering the child. She had finally found her voice with her sister. A few hours after her nephew was born, Elizabeth had curled up on the bed beside her sister and new favorite little gentleman, and bared her soul. She told Mary all that she had been feeling and how she desired to have a friendship with her. Mary cried, Elizabeth cried, and then little Matthew cried—but mostly from hunger. Everything was going to change between her and Mary in the most wonderful way. Perhaps Elizabeth would even consider getting to know Vienna Loxley better as well.
And then Elizabeth’s mind turned to Oliver and she remembered the way his lips had felt on her forehead, the look in his eyes when he had admitted to not wanting a family, and then how dashing he had looked holding Matthew. She had refused to let herself cry just then. Everything in her had suddenly hurt. Oliver told her to go to the house party—and he knew what that meant for her. She had her final answer concerning Oliver’s feelings for her. Again.
“I’ve decided to accept the dowager’s invitation for the house party.” Elizabeth couldn’t bring herself to look at Rose or Carver. She was afraid that if her eyes met her sister-in-law’s, she would no longer be able to keep her tears inside.
“What house party?” asked Carver.
Rose hadn’t told him about it yet?
“Elizabeth…or rather, we all, have all been invited to Lord Hastings’s country estate for a house party next week.”
“Oh,” said Carver, sounding slightly let down. Because he hated the idea of attending a house party? Or— “I see. And…does this mean what I think it means?”