The Off Limits Rule (It Happened in Nashville 1)

Lucy: Hi? What do you think you’re doing?

I set my phone down again and attempt to dive back into my date. Any responses from Cooper will just have to wait.

“So, tell me about yourself, Ethan.” I sound way too excited to hear about his life, like I’m overcompensating for wishing I was sitting across the restaurant instead. I hope he doesn’t pick up on that.

“Well, I’m sure you put two and two together and realized I’m divorced”—he whispers it dramatically like he knows it’s a dirty word—“and I have a daughter named Emily. I love my job at the hospital, and I prefer summer over winter.” Ew. Did that feel a little like a round of speed dating to you? It makes me nervous that the format seems to be ingrained in him—like maybe he’s done the whole five-minutes-who’s-next thing too many times. “What about you?”

“As you know, my name is Lucy. I have a four-ye

ar-old son named Levi”—why am I doing the speed-dating thing now? Oh well, I’ve committed—“and I prefer cake to ice cream.”

He laughs like this is the funniest thing he’s ever heard. I am so bored, though. Thankfully, Ethan gets a phone call from HIS sitter and says he has to take it.

My phone buzzes.

I try to keep my gaze appropriately fixed on my date and NOT at that screen. My eyes are watering because I’ve taken it to the next level and won’t blink either. Must not look away. Prepare to ask this man questions about his daughter’s sleeping habits, or daytime activities, or…oh, screw it.

Cooper: You look too hot for him. Is he a snooze fest?

Lucy: Stop it! What are you doing here??? Besides, you don’t have much room to talk. Who’s Barbie? Can you hear her brain rattle when she moves?

Cooper: Don’t be jelly. She’s a lawyer, if you must know, you sexist.

Lucy: What type of lawyer? Plastic surgery malpractice? I can see her boobs from all the way over here, so I know she must get a good discount.

Cooper: I can see your boobs from all the way over here, but you don’t see me judging.

I gasp and look up to find Cooper smiling at his water glass.

Ethan hangs up with an apologetic smile. The waitress then comes to the table at that exact moment, and I’m given five more seconds to respond while Ethan puts in his order, and then I HAVE to put my phone away.

Lucy: It’s different. I have mom boobs. These babies are unpredictable, and you never know how they will react to sudden movements. Hers are so fake and perky I’m worried your eye might get poked out if she leans forward an inch.

There. I replied, and now I will enjoy my date with this nice, normal guy Drew approves of. Is it a bad sign that we’ve spent most of the ten minutes we’ve been here on our phones?

Ethan smiles, glances down at my phone in my hand, and looks back up to my face. “Everything okay?”

“Definitely. Just…the sitter needing advice on how to get Levi to bed.” Yep, I’m the worst. Super.

“Gosh,” he says, leaning back in his chair and unbuttoning the top of his suit jacket. “I do not miss those days—the sleepless nights and all that. I swear it gets easier, though. Just hang in there.”

Blehhh, this is so boring. If I wanted to talk about kids, I could have joined a mom’s stroller club. Did I squeeze into this hotrod dress and spend too long applying eyeliner so we could talk about the kids we are trying to get away from for a night? Is this my future? I don’t think I’m being fair, though. He’s actually a super-nice guy, and he’s being sweet to appeal to the parental side of me. Problem is, I feel like we’ve already been married for five years—and not in a good way. I need some spark, some tension, some…

Cooper is calling.

Code red, people! COOPER IS CALLING ME!

In an incriminating movement, I jerk my phone off the table before Ethan can see the shirtless picture Cooper apparently assigned as his caller ID in my phone. When did he do that? And how did I miss it happening?

“I’m sorry,” I say to Ethan, looking deeply apologetic. “I need to take this.”

Poor Ethan. He’s so sweet. “Of course! Take your time,” he says, wrongly assuming this is my sitter calling me.

I swipe open my phone and hold it to my ear, angling myself slightly away from the table. “Hello?”

“Why do you always do that?” Cooper says, like it’s the most normal thing to interrupt my date like this and launch right into a private conversation.

I fumble with my silverware and sneak a glance at Ethan with a polite smile. “Do what?”