Down that road, danger lies.
Drawing in my breath, I knocked on his bedroom door. “Thane,” I said as loudly as I dared.
I heard movement almost right away and then the door swung open and there he was, sleep rumpled in his pajamas. He stared warily at me. “Regan?”
“Downstairs.” I nodded toward the stairwell. “Please.”
He nodded and followed me downstairs.
Once in the kitchen, I settled on the opposite side of the island from him to give us space.
“What is it?” he asked, his brow furrowed, his beautiful eyes filled with concern. “Has something happened?”
“No. I just … I’m sorry for how early it is, but I couldn’t sleep and I just …” I took a breath to control my nerves. “I wanted to apologize for my behavior.” My cheeks burned with embarrassment and shame. “I haven’t been acting like myself, and I’ve treated you unfairly.”
Thane frowned. “You’re not at fault here, Regan. I sent out the wrong signals. I’m sorry.”
Ignoring the sting of his rejection, I shook my head. “No. I should have gotten over it when you asked me to, and I just kept dragging it out. You’re a grown man, and you can date whoever the hell you like and … I don’t want to lose this job.” I tried to smile through my fears, tried to do the easy-breezy Regan thing, but tears brightened my eyes as I thought about Eilidh and Lewis. “I adore those kids.” I gestured upstairs, my tears spilling over to my everlasting mortification. “This is a great job, and I love being near my sister and—”
“Hey, hey, hey.” Thane interrupted me softly, holding his hands up and taking a step toward me. Then he stopped himself, looking a little helpless. “Please don’t cry. We’ll figure this out, okay? You can keep the job. We’ll figure it out. I don’t want to lose you either. It would devastate the kids.”
I swiped at my cheeks, irritated by my emotional display. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to cry. I’m not a crier or someone who uses tears to get their own way. That’s not—”
“Regan.”
At his authoritative tone, I stopped talking.
He pressed his lips together in a kind smile. “Maybe, from now on, we just go forward assuming the other only has the best of intentions. How does that sound?”
Relaxing somewhat, I nodded. “That sounds good.”
“Good. So are we starting over, then?”
“I’d like that very much.”
Thane released a heavy sigh of relief and grinned. He was so sexy I could cry again. I stubbornly ignored the butterflies in my belly.
“Good. That’s great. So … will you join us at Dunrobin Castle today?”
Stunned, I didn’t know what to say. When he suggested starting over, I thought we’d set boundaries, not return to how we were before the hands-on-ass drama. Dunrobin Castle was the one Lewis had mentioned earlier in the week. It was in a place called Golspie, on the North Coast, about thirty minutes north of Ardnoch. The kids had never been to it before despite its proximity.
“I don’t want to intrude.”
“Well, the kids have been pestering me all week to invite you. I didn’t because of how things were between us, but not because I didn’t want you there. Eilidh and Lewis enjoy having you around, and I just want my children happy.”
Why, oh why did he have to be such a wonderful dad?
“But no pressure.” He hurried to say. “If you need boundaries, we can do that.”
And let him think I was so crazy about him, I couldn’t be around him?
I still had some pride, for God’s sake.
“No, it’s fine.” I shrugged, like it was no big deal. “I’ll come hang out with you guys.”
Regan Penhaligon, you are such a masochist.
18
Regan
I’d returned to the annex to shower and dress. When I went back into the main house, I found Thane in the best mood he’d been in since McClintock had approached him. I assumed the man hadn’t been in touch again, but I made a note to find a private moment to ask. Other than a quick double glance at my legs when I walked in (I was wearing one of my preppy short dresses with thick tights, a pair of cute ankle boots, and an emerald-green, double-breasted pea coat I’d purchased online with my nice new salary), he’d treated me with nothing but friendly civility.
Eilidh and Lewis were happy I was joining them on their day out, but as always it took us twice as long to get them ready as we figured. By the time we climbed into Thane’s SUV, it was already midmorning.
“What’s so special about this castle?” I asked as we drove through the village. “It can’t be as spectacular as Ardnoch.” Not that I’d spent as much time there as I would’ve liked.
Thane smirked. “Ardnoch will always be special. Even if it was drafty and miserable to live in when we were children.”