That meant returning downstairs already.
To where Regan had insisted on cleaning up the kitchen after a night of showing him and the kids how to make homemade pizza to end their day of “celebrations.” It was so good, and the kids loved it so much, Thane was considering getting an outside pizza oven.
Of course, it would have been an even better night if Regan wasn’t so pissed off she couldn’t even talk to him. He knew Lewis had noticed because he’d grown quieter as the night wore on.
Damn it.
Reaching in to close his son’s door, Lewis’s voice stopped him.
“Dad.”
“Hey, bud, thought you were sleeping.” He crept into the room.
In the light spill from the hallway, Thane watched his son turn to look at him—and he was glowering.
Uh-oh.
“What is it, Lew?”
“Ree-Ree seems mad at you.”
Thane tensed. “We’re fine, buddy.”
“You were mad at her, and now she’s mad at you.”
Christ, his seven-year-old was too perceptive. “No, we’re good, Lew.”
His son glared harder. “She’s going to go away. And it’s your fault.” His voice broke as he buried his head in his pillow.
Oh, fucking hell. Rounding the bed, Thane sat down and placed a hand on Lewis’s shoulder. His son pushed his face deeper into the pillow.
“Lew, Regan and I are friends. She’s not going away. Not just yet. But you know, wee man, that she’s your nanny. She’s not part of the family,” he reminded him gently, even as each word caused an ache in his chest. “You have to be prepared for that.”
Lewis took a shuddering breath and turned to look at him. Thane’s heart broke at the sadness in his son’s eyes. “Why do people always have to leave?”
No, Thane was wrong. Now his heart fucking broke. He’d never wanted his children to have the childhood he had. To lose their mother.
Determined that when Fran died, he wouldn’t crumble like his own father had, he’d poured every ounce of his soul into fatherhood. Thane had thought he was doing not too bad a job, but the ordeal with Lucy, perhaps his handling of it, seemed to remind Lewis of loss. Not for him—Lew had never really taken to Lucy (Thane should have seen that as a warning sign)—but for his wee sister who’d thought the actress hung the moon and the sun. Thane was only grateful that his daughter was resilient and had been quick to transfer her affection to Regan.
“I don’t want you to think that,” Thane whispered, lying down beside Lewis to tuck him into his arms. He burrowed into his dad, and Thane held him tighter. “Not everyone leaves, Lew. I’m not going anywhere. Neither is Uncle Lachlan or Aunt Arrochar, or Aunt Robyn and Uncle Mac.” He didn’t mention Brodan or Arran. They’d grown too unpredictable for him to make any promises on their behalf. The reminder agitated him.
“What about Ree-Ree? She’s Aunt Robyn’s sister. Why can’t she stay?”
Thane exhaled slowly, feeling the loss of her already. “Because she’s young, Lew. She’s got her whole life ahead of her. She needs to go off and experience the world a bit before she settles down. Not to mention, her parents live in America. Her life is back there.”
And there it was.
The truth.
No matter her attraction to him, Thane knew that no twenty-five-year-old would want to settle down in a remote Scottish village with a man thirteen years her senior and play mum to his two children. Christ, Fran hadn’t wanted it, and she’d chosen it.
“I want her to stay,” Lewis whispered sadly.
“I know, buddy. But try not to think about her leaving. It’s not for a while yet. And she’s here now. Just enjoy having her with us for now, okay?”
Lewis nodded, but Thane knew he didn’t understand. How could he? All he knew was that a woman he cared about because she so obviously cared about him was temporary. And that made little sense to a boy who was raised on the belief that his mother loved him and hadn’t wanted to leave him and if it had been up to her, she never would have.
Knowing his son was going to take Regan’s leaving as proof she didn’t love him, Thane squeezed his eyes closed, tightened his hold on Lewis, and stayed with him until he fell asleep.
However, the longer he lay there, the more he stewed. Lewis wouldn’t have fallen asleep with tears in his eyes if Regan had treated Thane with civility and professionalism tonight. Yes, he’d been a prick at Morag’s, and he’d admit it, but she couldn’t act like that around the kids. They were too perceptive, and she should know that by now.
Unfortunately for her, when he came downstairs, she was still there.
Heat licked through him at the sight of her in her prim little dress with its not-so-prim fucking hemline. As she bent over to load the last of the dishes into the dishwasher, he caught a flash of her arse. Sadly, the thick tights she wore covered it.