A few minutes later, the doors shut tight, and Joely took off. The roar of the engines surrounded her, and Lucy clasped her hands in her lap, reminding herself that the flight would be over before she knew it. She just had to keep her irrational fears in check.
She drew deep breaths, counting in and out, to ten and back, seeking calm. And praying Max would close his eyes and ignore her ridiculous reaction to the flight.
* * *
Max glanced down at Lucy’s fingers, twisted so tightly the tips were practically white from pressure and lack of circulation.
He covered her hands with his larger one. “Hey. We’re safe. And it’s a short trip.”
“I know. I’ve made this trip many times, remember?”
He didn’t buy the flippant answer. “Then what’s got you so stressed out?” He brushed his thumb over the soft skin on her hand.
She blew out a long breath, her glossed lips puckering in a way that had his own mouth watering. He was dying to taste her again, to nibble on those luscious lips and make her forget all about whatever was bothering her.
Instead he grasped her chin and turned her to face him. Her dark blue eyes were wide and filled with fear. “Lucy?”
“Do you think my parents knew?” she asked. “At the end, I mean? Or do you think they were just here and then… gone?” The question took him off guard.
It was one he’d asked himself many times about Cindy, who’d ironically died the same way. Except Lucy’s parents had been in a torrential rainstorm, and Cindy hadn’t been. It was the last topic he’d have thought was on her mind now.
“I wish I had an answer,” he said honestly. “But I don’t. I do, however, understand why you wonder.”
She winced. “I’m sorry. I forgot your… wife”—she choked over the word—“died the same way. That was insensitive of me.”
“It’s okay.” Cindy was a subject they’d have to discuss at some point… but they were a long way from that day. “I never realized you being in this tin can would bring back those memories.”
She sniffed, the tip of her nose turning red. “I try not to think about it often but yeah. In here, it always comes back.”
“Why didn’t you fly out with Decklan and Amanda? Or wait for Gabe and Isabelle?” He hesitated before adding, “Or ask me what flight I was taking?”
“I need to know I can survive these things alone.”
He appreciated the fact that she confided in him, and as always, he admired her strength. But her words confounded him. “Hmm.”
“What’s that for?”
“You didn’t say you need to do these things on your own, but that you need to survive them. It just strikes me,” he said carefully, knowing that picking into her mind could cause her to withdraw, “that it’s a drastic way of looking at things. Just like I think moving and staying in California is a drastic way of protecting yourself from being hurt.”
She narrowed her gaze. “When did you become a psychologist?”
He shrugged. “Trust me, in the last four years, I’ve had a lot of time to analyze my actions and to think. So yeah, I like to think I know what I’m talking about.”
He paused for a moment, then continued. “Just ask yourself one thing. If something suddenly happened to one of your brothers, like it did to your parents, would living so far away really protect you from pain? Or would you regret not soaking up all the time with them you could have beforehand?”
She opened her mouth to answer, probably to rip into him, and then turbulence hit. The plane bounced repeatedly. He grabbed the armrest and held on. If they hadn’t been seat belted, they’d have been seriously jostled around inside the plane.
“Hang on, folks,” Joely called over her shoulder. “I just need to bring us to a higher altitude for a less bumpy ride.”
Max clamped his hand over Lucy’s. A glance told him she’d gone pale. “Did I ever tell you I’m afraid of roller coasters?” he asked.
“Liar.” The corners of her mouth turned up slightly, and he considered it a victory.
The plane jolted so hard he felt it in the pit of his stomach.
“Just a tropical storm that came in fast. I’ll get us out,” Joely said from the front of the plane, her voice a calm promise.
But the wild look in Lucy’s eyes didn’t abate.