Griff wasn’t surprised that she’d all but asked his intentions. It was only a matter of time. As an attorney, he’d seen her question, cross-examine, and win the toughest cases. Only in her personal life had she seemed fragile, but that fragility cracked yesterday. She’d grown stronger since. When she’d admitted her past, she had faced her own demons. After that, cornering Griff about his feelings couldn’t be too tough.
He sat on the corner of his desk, watching as she swiveled her chair back and forth.
“I’m not pressuring you for an answer. I’m just curious about what’s going through your mind,” she said.
He decided on honesty. “Remember I told you I’d been engaged?”
She nodded. “You’re still in love with her?” Her voice nearly cracked under the strain of asking such a potentially devastating question.
“I don’t think I ever was. I think she fulfilled certain expectations,” he admitted, thinking of his selfish ex-fiancée.
“Such as?”
“She left me when things got rough. She wanted my six-figure salary and the perks that came along with the partnership. She wanted what I could give her, but she never wanted me.”
“Or Alix,” Chelsie murmured.
“Exactly. You, on the other hand, claim to want both.”
She narrowed her eyes and Griff could almost see her analytical mind sifting through the information. It was only a matter of time before she figured things out on her own. Griff waited.
“So the question is do I want you, or do I want what you can give me—what I can’t have on my own?” She clenched her fists, apparently forgetting she still held the documents. The papers crumpled under the strain. “Is that an accurate assessment of what you’re thinking?” she asked.
He bit down on the inside of his cheek. “Yes.”
She nodded. “And here I thought your greatest concern would be that I couldn’t give you children of your own. Tell me, is that also a problem for you, counselor?”
“No.”
“Right.” She surged to her feet, anger and hurt more than evident in her dark eyes. “Every man wants his own flesh and blood, Griff. Don’t kid yourself or me. Somewhere down the line, you’d resent me because I couldn’t give you a child of your own.”
“Whatever put that idea in your head?”
She shrugged. “It doesn’t matter. I only asked because I was curious.”
He couldn’t believe she thought so little of him. Could she truly think he’d only want her if she could bear his children? “You’re wrong, Chelsie. It matters very much.”
“Not really.” She collected the scattered papers on the desk and shuffled them into a neat stack. “If you could even think that I’d use you, that all I want from you is what you could give me, then we never had much between us anyway.”
“You don’t believe that.”
She shook her head and offered him a sad smile. “No. But obviously you do.”
After placing the papers down, she rounded the corner of the desk and came up beside him. She placed a warm hand against his cheek. “I know you’ve lost a lot in your life. You’re tough because you had to be. But if you continue to expect so little from people, that’s exactly what you’ll get in return.”
“That’s not what this is about.”
“Isn’t it? Your mother left you. Your ex-fiancée did the same. They both wanted something you couldn’t give them. When they left, you were able to say, ‘See, all women are alike’.” She paused to catch her breath. “When you realized I wasn’t running anywhere, you got so damned scared you had to push me away. You’re afraid to trust that I mean what I say, so you come up with the excuse that I’m just like them—I don’t love you, I love what you can give me.”
In an effort to get what she wanted and remain with Alix, had Chelsie convinced herself she loved him, too? Knowing her as he did, the thought was absurd. And yet...
He could never be sure. “Don’t you?” The words escaped before he could stop them.
Her eyes opened wide. “No,” she whisp
ered.
The tears welling in the brown depths told him in no uncertain terms he’d pushed her too far. He’d hurt her in a fundamental way, and she deserved better. He reached out to her, but she stepped back to avoid his touch.