“Come back. Please. You deserve an explanation.”
He walked toward her. His sneakers squeaked against the wooden planks. “You sure you don’t want to take this inside?”
“Not yet. Just sit, okay?”
He joined her near a lounge chair and waited.
“I’m... afraid,” she admitted softly.
Mike knelt down next to her and reached for her hand. Her skin felt cold and clammy and he realized she wasn’t exaggerating. “You don’t have a monopoly on fear, Carly.”
He looked into her eyes. The emotions churning inside her caused her brown eyes to appear darker than usual. “How can you talk about fear? You drop into danger-filled situations for a photograph. What can possibly frighten you?”
“More than you can imagine.” He’d witnessed children being orphaned like himself. He’d left in mid-assignment and violated every professional code by which he lived. Those realities were hard enough, but the fears he had been referring to had nothing to do with his past or his career. They had everything to do with Carly.
He traced the veins in her slender wrist with his thumb. She dropped her gaze. The wildly erratic beat of her pulse moved him in ways he failed to comprehend. And therein lay the source of his fear.
“I’m afraid you’ll throw me out without us ever having had the chance to explore what’s between us.” Raising her hand, he kissed the throbbing pulse point in her wrist. “And I’m afraid you’ll let me stay and I’ll lose part of myself to you.” Worse, he knew. Even if he stuck around now, he’d take off when the call came, leaving her stranded and alone. Hurt again. No matter how good his personal reasons, he’d create a mess he had no idea how to undo.
Startled eyes met his and he laughed. “Welcome to the club,” she said.
“What frightens you?” he asked.
“The feelings between us.”
He nodded in silent acknowledgment. Until recently he’d believed her fear was grounded in guilt over Peter. Without a ring binding her to another man that theory no longer applied. Which meant something more was at work, something more held her back from Mike.
“And,” she continued, “the fact that no matter how torn you were, you betrayed me. You spent days on end with me, knowing Peter was cheating. Knowing I was sacrificing to make him happy when he wasn’t doing nearly the same thing for me. I trusted him. I trusted you. And I’m not sure what that says about my judgment, all things considered.”
“I tried every which way short of outright betraying my brother to let you know you were making a mistake. When you’re ready, you’ll know that’s true. But since you’re not, I’ll be going.”
She rolled her eyes. “Where? To sleep in your car, or were you planning to pitch a tent?”
“I’ve made do in worse and you know it.”
“But not while I was consumed with guilt. There’s a guest room,” she muttered, just as the skies seemed to open wide and a torrential downpour began.
She ran for the house and Mike followed, ducking under the rolltop awning and through the sliding glass doors. Once inside, she grabbed for two towels in a hall closet and tossed one his way. They dried off in silence, Mike refusing to glance at her wet T-shirt or tousled hair, tossed by the wind.
He also refused to contemplate his motives. He could have gotten into his car and driven the long ride home. Instead he’d checked out the last motel and U-turned it back here. He glanced over.
“I’ll take you up on that room,” he said at last. He purposely didn’t say for how long. Both knew he couldn’t stay.
Carly nodded. So he was staying. It wouldn’t be for long, she knew. She raised her gaze. “I’ll make up the room.”
“I’d appreciate that.”
“I hope you realize you won,” she said, unable to control her words. She couldn’t help feeling as if she’d been set up with this trip of his.
“No, Carly. We win,” he said quietly. “We share something special, and no matter how temporary my stay is, we’re good for each other.”
Unexpected tears filled her eyes as he spoke. Swallowing over the lump in her throat, she forced out equal amounts of honesty. “There’s something you should know.”
“I intend to know everything about you.”
He retrieved her hand and she trembled under the heat of his strong touch.
“You’re an experiment for me,” she said.