He turned. She’d come up behind him, still wearing the sheet, although now it was draped tight around her like a sarong. Her fingers gripped the edges, clutching onto the ends hard and fast.
“Do you blame me? You do realize you’re standing undressed in a Planned Parenthood examining room?”
Deep purple eyes gazed at him in dismay and disappointment. “Is that what you think of me? Forgetting the one night that created this baby? You were closer to my family than anyone else. You ignored football to listen to my hopes and dreams of being a teacher, of being a mother one day.”
Her voice caught and Kevin’s stomach lurched in response.
“You of all people know how many losses I’ve suffered in the past few years. Both my parents, my brother, and...” She halted without warning, but the tension was obvious in the set of her shoulders and the flush in her cheeks.
She was right, Kevin realized. In all his mulling over the angles of this situation, he’d never factored Nikki’s past into the equation. How could he think she’d willingly get rid of her own child? He’d kick himself if he could.
How much more pain would he cause her? “Go on,” he said softly, hoping to somehow calm her down. Distress couldn’t be good for the baby or its mother.
“Forget it” She blinked at the moisture forming in her eyes. A lone tear trickled down her face and the truth settled in his gut.
He could do many things. Forgetting what she’d been about to say wasn’t one of them. “You were listing your losses. Your parents, Tony... and who else?”
“Janine,” she said quickly, averting her gaze.
“True, but it’s not who you meant.” Kevin had no desire to torture her any more than he wanted to bring the issue to light. But if he and Nikki didn’t resolve their night together once and for all, her pain, resentment, and anger would eat her alive.
He might deserve to be horsewhipped for leaving her, but she needed to expunge her anger. Then they’d have to find a way to go on.
He placed a finger beneath her chin and raised her head until their eyes met “Who else, Nicole?”
“You,” she spat. “You left me too.” Eyes blazing, cheeks also on fire, yet Nikki held her own. He was proud of her. Maybe they’d come to terms with each other yet.
“And each time you say or do something like this...” She gestured around the sterile room. “You tear me apart all over again. I won’t have it, Kevin. Do you want to know why I’m here?”
Not trusting himself to speak, he merely nodded.
“For prenatal care. Where else would I go for basic visits? I don’t have insurance, I can’t afford a private doctor...” Her shoulders shook as she spoke, testament to the effort this confrontation was taking.
He knew how difficult this trip must have been for her alone. He’d had a hell of a time finding the clinic and he wasn’t afraid to venture down side streets and alleys.
He wrapped an arm around her and led her back to the examining table. Her soft skin brushed his fingers, and her tantalizing scent touched his heart. She sat down and inhaled deeply.
She had enough strength for both of them, he thought. He took some of her courage and drew it into himself. From now on though, she’d lean on him. He’d see to it.
“If you’d been willing to sit down with me and talk, we could have resolved some of those issues instead of you having to turn to clinical care. Alone.”
“Why would I sit down with you? You walked out once. Even if you’re here to stay now, and for the record, I believe you are—”
“You do?”
She sighed. “You’re a good man, Kevin. That’s half the problem. You’ll be here for the baby. I know you wouldn’t abandon your child. But there’s no way in hell I’ll rely on you again.”
Before he could respond, the door creaked open on old hinges. “Everything okay in here?” the doctor asked.
“‘Yes,” Nikki answered.
“Then if you don’t mind, we have to get started. I have patients waiting and I’m running late as it is.”
“Come on in.” He spared a glance at Nikki’s pale, drawn face.
“Weren’t you just leaving?” she asked.
He shook his head. “It’s our baby’s heartbeat, Nicole. I’m not going anywhere.”