Because…he was no better than his father. The truth hurt. In trying to avoid the trap his father had fallen into, Mike had landed there anyway and he’d probably lost his only chance at happiness. The only difference was that Mike claimed sanity while avoiding what frightened him. Only now that Amber was gone did Mike have the courage to face his fears.
Her words, the ones she’d used when she’d refused to tell Marshall she loved him, “I don’t love you, I love him,” ran through his mind nonstop.
Taunting him.
I love him, she’d said.
And at the moment when Mike thought he might lose her to Marshall and his gun, Mike had gone cold inside. Because though he hadn’t verbalized it, he’d realized he loved her, too. And that love scared him, causing him to avoid her. He’d still been running, holding tight to the reasons he’d sent her away—the fear of instability, roller coaster and insanity.
Mike looked at the empty street where the bus had once been and realized those reasons suddenly meant very little when compared to losing her forever.
He’d been a fool, he thought, running a frustrated hand through his hair. He’d been too afraid to face his feelings before, because if he let himself love her…His though
ts trailed off and he broke into a sweat.
Afraid if he let himself love her…what?
Alone, Mike walked to the end of the sidewalk where the bus station ended. He and his friends used to hang out in the empty lot here. For Mike, the place had been an escape from his tense family life—at least until he and his mother had moved out. An escape from the arguments between his parents and the uncertainty of his father’s mood swings. Mike had never known what he’d come home to. He’d always been afraid of ending up just like Edward, pushed to the edge by the curse. Or loving someone too much.
Amber had pushed and pulled. She’d abandoned him in Vegas, taken his money, left him alone only to show up again in Boston. With every lie by omission, every little truth finally revealed, Mike had suffered one punch to the gut after another.
He shoved his hands into his jeans pockets. His father had the power to put him on that painful roller-coaster ride because Mike loved the ornery old man.
Amber had the same power over him, he realized now, because he loved her, too.
He glanced at his watch and wondered if he could get to Boston before her bus. If not, he’d probably be able to head her off before she boarded the next bus out West.
He ran for his car only to be stopped by the cop he’d questioned earlier. “Corwin!” the other man called.
“Yeah?” Mike turned, trying not to sound annoyed.
Now that he’d made his decision, he wanted to find Amber immediately.
“Dispatch just radioed in. Your father was taken to the county hospital. Possible heart attack,” the officer said. “I’m sorry, man.”
“Thank you.” Mike glanced up at the sky and swore aloud. When in the hell would he catch a break?
He dialed Amber’s cell phone, but it went directly to voice mail. He didn’t leave a message. What he had to say could only be done face-to-face.
After he made certain his father was okay.
With the police car leading the way, Mike sped to the hospital, raced into the emergency entrance and ran through the doors leading to the patients. All the while, his heart was lodged dead center in his throat. Because, for all the aggravation that went along with being Edward Corwin’s son, Mike loved his father. And he did not want to lose him.
He heard his family’s voices immediately and zeroed in on his cousin Derek’s, the one person he could trust to be a voice of reason.
“What’s going on?” Mike asked, winded from his panic.
“He’s okay,” Derek assured him first. “After you took off, his agitation increased. He started complaining of chest pains in between his ranting about the damn curse again. I brought him right over.”
“Thanks.” Mike sapped his cousin on the back. “What’d the doctors say?”
“They ran some blood work and said Edward hadn’t had a heart attack. But they need to check it two more times. Some kind of protocol. He’s hooked up to a monitor.”
Not a heart attack. Thank God.
“What do they think it is?” Mike asked.
“Too early to say, but my guess is a panic attack.” Derek shook his head. “I’m only surprised it hasn’t happened sooner.”