“No,” she murmured, resting her head on his shoulder as she continued to comfort him. “Tell me the rest of it.”
He sighed, tipping his head against the cool window. “Isn’t it obvious? I got hooked and told myself I wasn’t. It numbed the pain. And what did it get me?” he asked bitterly, angry at himself.
“I pushed away the best friends I ever had, lost out on working on a revolutionary application, not to mention a billion-dollar IPO. Eventually I pulled my head out of my ass and got clean.” The why of that was another ugly story for another day, Julian thought.
“But did being sober make me a good human being? No. I still went after Kade and Blink, used you, because all I could think about was saving my family from debt and destruction. Because I felt so guilty that I stupidly gave up that opportunity for addiction, I did things I still can’t comprehend.”
“Hey.” She turned him toward her, and in her eyes, he didn’t see disgust or condemnation.
He got a solid glimpse of understanding he still wasn’t sure he deserved, but knew he desperately wanted and needed.
“We all make mistakes,” she insisted, her pretty blue eyes begging him to believe.
“We all make choices,” he immediately corrected her.
She inclined her head. “Whatever you want to call them, we’re still entitled to forgiveness.”
“Even me?”
She cupped his face between her soft palms, her gaze steady on his. “Especially you,” she murmured, leaning in close until her lips brushed over his.
Chapter Six
Kendall hadn’t planned the kiss. She merely wanted Julian to know he was forgiven, that he deserved to put the past behind him just like she had. But she also needed to be close to him. And so she acted on impulse, but not the dangerous kind that led her into trouble, the kind that was born of deep need. If temptation did cause her trouble, only time would tell.
She’d meant to comfort, but the fire between them was still there, burning strong. Their mouths fused and desire burst free. Their sexual relationship had been hot, and clearly that hadn’t changed.
He grasped her hair, winding his hand through the long strands, and tilted her head to one side. Her mouth opened, and his tongue slid inside, tangling with his, her entire body softening. Her breasts, full and heavy, pressed against his hard chest, but he was focused on her mouth.
He held her head in place and kissed her, over and over, lips gliding over hers, his thumb caressing her cheek. She moaned, and he broke the kiss, sliding his finger across her damp bottom lip.
Feeling naughty, she slicked her tongue out and licked his thumb.
“That’s my kitten.”
A full-body shiver took hold at the endearment, her nipples puckering into hardened peaks. The old Kendall, the brazen, brave, un-medicated Kendall, would have had her shirt off in an instant, her own hands cupping her breasts, offering herself to him. But now she was more sober and, it seemed, more thoughtful. The notion of playing that way embarrassed her more than anything. Sex didn’t feel as wild and free.
“Hey. Where did you go?” He trailed his wet finger down her cheek, over her jaw, nudging her head up to look at him.
“I was thinking about us. Before. I’m not the same person. I don’t feel the same. I don’t act the same. It’s the meds,” she felt compelled to explain.
Maybe he wouldn’t want her this way.
Maybe he expected the wild, uninhibited version of Kendall Parker. She ducked her head, not wanting to see the disappointment in his face.
“One question,” he said, nudging her chin up so she had to meet his gaze.
She blinked up at him, waiting.
“Do you feel? When I kiss you?” He brushed his lips over hers, nipping at her bottom lip.
Sensation
shot from the sting of his bite to her swollen sex. “Yes,” she murmured.
A satisfied smile lifted his lips into a seductive grin. “How about this?” He reached out and tweaked her nipple through her shirt.
Once again, sweet pain reverberated to her clit, and she answered with a soft groan.