Dirty Sexy Sinner (Dirty Sexy 4)

“I’m not sure what you mean,” Tara said, trying to follow her friend’s line of questioning.

Katrina curled her fingers around the edge of the desk and casually swung her legs back and forth. “Well, you said that Jackson deserved better than what you had to offer. Is the only thing you have to offer him sex? Or is there . . . more?”

She knew what Katrina was asking, and the ache in her heart made itself known. “Definitely more, at least for me.” She swallowed hard and said the words out loud for the first time. “I love him.” Unconditionally. Irrevocably.

Katrina’s green eyes softened. “Have you told him?”

“No,” she whispered, hating that her insecurities, and the fear of rejection, had kept her from opening her heart to him.

Katrina tipped her head to the side, studying Tara too insightfully. “So, what you have to offer Jackson is love, the one thing he’s been searching for his entire life, yet you’ve decided to withhold it from him. Because he deserves better?” she asked incredulously. “Don’t you think you should put all your emotional cards on the table and let Jackson be the judge of that?”

God, Katrina was right, yet . . . “What if . . . he doesn’t feel the same way?”

“I don’t think that’s possible,” Katrina said with a soft, knowing smile. “Not judging by the way he treats you and looks at you. But you won’t know until you take a chance and get your feelings out in the open. He’s a good man, Tara. We all know it and see it. Well, it took the guys a little longer to get their shit together in that department,” she said with a laugh. “But even Mason has told me that Jackson belongs in this family not because he was born a Kincaid but because he possesses all those qualities that make him a Kincaid.”

Tara already knew what those traits were, even without asking. Honesty. Integrity. Being loyal and passionate and protective. So many of the things she loved about him. Things she wanted and needed from a man in her life.

“But what if—”

Katrina shook her head, cutting Tara off. “No buts. Don’t get so caught up in the past that you can’t see the woman you are today. I almost made that mistake myself, and it nearly cost me my best friend and the man I love,” she said of Mason, her husband and the love of her life. “You’re no longer that defiant, angry girl who took drugs to cope with the shitty circumstances in her life. You haven’t been that person for six years now, Tara, and it doesn’t matter what happened today at Jackson’s office. The girl that Brynn is so bitter and angry at is not the sober, responsible, independent woman you’ve become. And I’m pretty sure that’s the woman Jackson wants in his life.”

Everything Katrina said struck a chord in Tara and calmed the chaos that had been swirling inside of her since leaving Jackson’s office. She felt more in control, more . . . like herself. Katrina was right. She couldn’t spend the rest of her life living in the past, not if she wanted the kind of future she’d always hoped for and dreamed about. A future that included Jackson in every aspect of her life—if she had her way.

She’d talk to him and put her heart in his hands. What happened next was up to him.

Chapter Fourteen

It took Jackson some time after his phone call had ended, and a whole lot of patience, to find out where Tara had gone after leaving his office. Once that business had been concluded, he’d gone straight to Walter’s office to see if the other man could sit in on the three o’clock meeting Jackson had scheduled with a client. He’d been honest about his reasons for needing to leave, and thank God Walter had not only agreed to handle the appointment but had let Jackson know just how much he liked Tara, and he promised to talk to Brynn and make it clear that kind of attack wasn’t welcome in the office.

Jackson couldn’t have been more relieved or grateful for the other man’s support. Then again, Walter, being a family man, was well aware of how bad Jackson’s previous marriage had been and just how long it had taken him to recover from Collette’s betrayal. Walter’s parting words to Jackson had been, Every man needs a good woman by his side, so don’t let Tara slip through your fingers.

He refused to let that happen, and the first order of business was telling Tara how he felt about her. That there wasn’t one thing—her past especially—that would keep him from loving her. Or being with her.

She didn’t answer any of the text messages that he sent, so he drove to the most likely place he thought he’d find her—her house. But when he arrived, she wasn’t there. His second guess had him picking up his cell phone and making a call to Clay so he didn’t run around on a wild goose chase trying to locate her.

“You looking for Tara?” Clay answered the phone without a friendly greeting, his voice gruff and direct.

“Yes.” Judging by Clay’s brusque question, Jackson’s brother knew something was going on, and he pressed him for answers. “How did you know? Is she at the bar?”

“No.” Clay’s voice remained cool as an iceberg. “Mason called to tell me that she came by Inked and that you did something to upset her.”

Jackson pinched the bridge of his nose between his fingers. He knew he hadn’t caused her to run. The situation had. But he wasn’t going to argue the point with his twin. “Is she still there?”

“That all depends on why you want to see her.”

Jesus Christ. He didn’t have time for this shit and decided to be blunt. “To tell her I love her,” Jackson replied, unable to conceal the frustration vibrating in his voice. “Is that a good enough reason?”

Clay was quiet for a long moment, then finally answered, sounding much less terse and more understanding. “Yeah, I suppose it is.”

“So that means I have permission to see her?” Jackson asked sarcastically.

“From me, yes.” There was a definite smirk in Clay’s voice. “But good luck getting past Mason.”

“Trust me, I can handle Mason,” Jackson replied as he started driving toward Inked, anxious to see Tara and finally set things right between them.

“I do believe you can,” Clay said with humor. He paused for a minute, then Jackson heard him release a deep breath before he added more seriously, “I know it was a rough few weeks when we first met, but I want you to know that I’m glad you contacted us and that you’re a part of our family.”

Jackson turned right on a street that led to the tattoo shop and felt his chest tighten with gratitude at his brother’s confession. Six weeks ago, he wasn’t sure he’d ever get to this point with his siblings, and was thankful to finally have their respect and acceptance. It’s all he’d ever wanted from them.