Nitro’s eyes locked onto mine and I felt the familiar pull to him. The need he stirred in me was too great to ignore. It had been two weeks since he’d walked out of my house and never came back. I hadn’t seen him or heard from him in that time. And I hadn’t gone looking for him because he’d made it clear what he wanted.
I couldn’t deal with any of them in that moment. I turned and walked away, picking up my pace as I moved so as to avoid any of them stopping me. But Nitro was faster than me, and a moment later, his hand curled around my arm. “Tatum, stop,” he commanded.
I closed my eyes and held my breath for a beat. On an exhale, I turned to face him. “What do you want, Nitro? I’ve gotta get to work.”
It was a lie and he knew it. Ignoring what I said, he asked, “You good?”
Emotions I never knew existed exploded out of me in a violent burst. “I’m sick of you asking me that goddam question! Do you even care if I’m good?” I threw my words at him as if they were fire and would burn him. I had no clue where my anger had come from or why I was directing it at him, but I couldn’t stop myself.
His nostrils flared and his eyes mirrored the anger I felt. He, however, managed to keep his in check. “I told you I don’t play games and I don’t do shit for any reason but how it appears, so when I ask you if you’re good, I mean it.”
I searched his eyes and knew right down to my bones that he meant every word he said. Nitro might have been many things but dishonest was not one of them. “I’m good.”
His gaze dropped to my arm where Duvall had held me. “What’s his game?”
“What do you mean?”
“Why did he come at me like that?”
“He’s seen the surveillance of us leaving the casino.”
His mind worked quickly, putting it together. “So he thinks I did that to you.” And then he surprised me. “You seeing him now?”
“What? No. Why?” His question threw me, completely bewildering me.
“Vegas, a man doesn’t get that worked up unless the woman means something to him. I’ve seen the way he looks at you and it’s pretty fucking clear he wants you. I need to know what I’m dealing with here. So, are you seeing him?”
My mind was still trying to unscramble itself. “No, I’m not seeing him.”
He nodded. “Okay.” He took a step back as if he was going to leave, but then he stopped and ran his eyes over my body. Slowly. As if he was committing it to memory. “I’ll look into this and let you know what I find. As far as I knew, that surveillance had been destroyed.”
And then he headed into the club with King, leaving me standing there all kinds of confused. Seeing him, speaking to him, hell, just being in his presence, made me realise how much I’d missed him. I hadn’t let a man into my life on a regular basis like I had with Nitro since my husband left me nearly two years ago. Sleeping together, spending nights together… we might not have shared anything from our lives with each other, but we’d shared our bodies in ways that meant something to me.
Shit.
I wanted him again.
My skin craved his touch.
My mind craved the escape his caress allowed.
And as much as I struggled admitting it, my soul craved the safety of his embrace.
Trouble was, he didn’t seem interested in any of that. I’d only ever been someone he had to watch over for his club. And I was still that person now that Duvall had involved himself.
“Are you still dating him?”
I spun around to find Duvall staring at me, wild-eyed. “No. We’re done.” He didn’t need to know that Nitro and I were never dating.
“Good.”
He left me then. I didn’t know where this would all end up. I should have cared. I should have chased after him to set him straight and convince him to drop it. But all I cared about was coping with the emptiness slaying me. The problem with that was I had no fucking clue how to make it go away and I knew that coping was a crock of shit. I could numb the pain and try to hide from it, but I could never fucking cope with it.
27
Nitro
“It Ain’t Easy” by Blake Shelton