She had lost her mind. It was the only explanation for her actions in the past couple hours. No, she couldn’t even say that. Her actions since learning the man she was dating was Dante Verducci had been off.
Had she pulled her shot?
Up until this moment, she would have sworn under oath that she didn’t. That she’d truly intended to kill him for the position he put her in. That their months of dating, of falling for him, hadn’t softened her heart to the man she’d discovered was the enemy.
Now? Now she wasn’t so sure. She was a fucking crack shot, especially at that range. Even with him moving quickly, she should have anticipated it and auto-corrected. She certainly had in the past.
She couldn’t talk to her mother about this. No matter how Mama and Papa’s relationship started, they wouldn’t be understanding. There was too much on the line for Rose to do something as reckless as fall for Dante Verducci. They would only see the cost. It didn’t matter that Papa terrorized Mama’s family for years before their marriage. It was all ancient history now.
She stopped short. No, Mama wouldn’t understand… But maybe Aunt Carrigan would. Rose grabbed her phone and dialed before she could second-guess herself. Of all her many aunts and uncles, she was closest to Carrigan. From a young age, she’d admired her gorgeous aunt and how effortlessly she shared power with her husband…and how unwilling she was to bend to others’ will.
Carrigan answered on the second ring. “I hear you’re right at the center of a brewing war. How very Helen of Troy of you.”
Rose perched on the edge of her bed and gave a wan smile. “I don’t know about that comparison. Seems like Helen got a raw deal with that war.”
“And you’re certainly not one to let others do your fighting.” She paused. “How are you, Rose? I hope that father of yours isn’t pulling some bullshit again. The shock at the wedding was enough for a few decades.”
The wedding where Lorelei walked down the aisle instead of Rose. Guilt swamped her again, threatening to choke her. “I need some advice.”
“Then you’ve called the right aunt. I have it in spades.” Cloth rustled through the line, and Rose could perfectly picture her aunt settling back in one of the grand chairs in her office and giving the phone her full attention. “Tell me.”
Rose took a long breath. Once she admitted this aloud, there was no going back. The thought almost made her laugh. There’d been no going back from the moment she slept with Dante after knowing his true identity. “When Uncle James kidnapped you… How did you get past that? How did the family get past that?” Because obviously they did. It was one of the O’Malley family legends at this point, how he’d hauled her out of the club and taken her home to be a sacrificial lamb for his vengeful father. How he let her escape, and months later they fell in love and fucked up my father’s plans to marry her.
Carrigan was quiet for so long, Rose found herself holding her breath. Finally, she said, “It’s a hard road, Rose. I wouldn’t choose it for you.”
Rose stared at her wall, her chest aching. She should hang up now before she said something she couldn’t take back, but the knowledge bubbled up inside her, needing an outlet. “It’s too late.”
“Ah.” Carrigan sighed, a wealth of experience in that single sound. “Sometimes the heart wants what the heart wants, no matter the consequences. I had a little more freedom than you do because I wasn’t heir.” She gave a bitter laugh. “Back then, women couldn’t be heirs. Even if I were born first, I would have been passed over for Aiden. It made me so angry, but it was a blessing in its way because a pawn is a pawn, regardless of what board you’re playing on. Even though it pissed off…well, your father…I secured an alliance with the Hallorans and stopped that brewing war.” Another bitter laugh. “There were always wars brewing in those days.”
“There’s one brewing right now.”
“That’s what I hear.” She sounded tired. “I can’t tell you what to do, love. I made my choice and decided the risk was worth the reward. No one can make that call except you.”
Rose swallowed hard. “If my family can’t get past this, they might remove me as heir.”
“Yes.” Carrigan didn’t soften the word at all. “That is one of the risks. You have to be the one to decide if you can bear the cost.”
If Rose were passed over, that would put Sasha squarely in the crosshairs. Her sweet, nervous sister would falter, which would mean the entire family would falter. But cutting Dante loose meant another political marriage in Rose’s future, this time likely to someone even more questionable than Romeo Capparelli. She’d long ago resigned herself to a marriage for power instead of for love, but…