I squeezed my eyes shut and pinched at the bridge of my nose. “I’ll call you later. Have a good night, Shelb.”
I clicked off before she could object, pocketed the phone, and made a quick exit, not stopping to smile at anyone or make small talk. I hit the door and jogged out to my truck.
I had to get out of here. Now.
21
Shelby
”God, I’m such a bitch.”
“Did you say something, dear?” Mom asked, peeking back around the corner as she exited the kitchen.
I shook my head and set my phone down on the counter. The coffee pot finished its final sputter, and I reached for a mug. “Just talking to myself.”
“Okay, dear. Your father and I are going to bed.” She dropped a glance at the full coffee pot. I could almost see her biting back a nugget of motherly advice about not drinking caffeine so close to bedtime. She just smiled and left the kitchen.
I poured a large mug, dumped in two spoons of sugar and a liberal splash of cream before returning to my place at the island. My notes, pictures, and files were spread out as I tried to write my opening argument. I’d managed to petition the courts for an appeal to a judge to retry the case. While it wasn’t quite the same format as an actual court case, I still wanted a strong statement, and my thoughts were too jumbled inside my own head. I needed to purge it all out and write it down, like a speech.
But after I met with Sam O’Brian and the unsettling phone call with Ross, I was more fucked up than ever.
I propped my elbows on the edge of the smooth countertop and planted my face between my palms, my fingers digging through my hair. “What the fuck am I doing?”
Ross was the best thing that had ever happened to me, but over the last week, since passing my bar exam and starting my new job, the cracks in our blossoming relationship were showing. Every time we’d gone out, I’d been so distracted by the questions blaring in the back of my mind that I hadn’t been able to focus on having a good time. I’d even been distracted in bed. Sure, the sex was still mind-blowing and hot, but it was like I was detached from it, as though I were some kind of voyeur, simply watching someone else with Ross.
I’d thought Ross was seeing it too, but after the phone call with him, I realized that we were on two different pages entirely. He wasn’t seeing the signs that I was, and I’d gutted him by not being there to cheer him on at his last game before the Super Bowl. The strained tone of his voice was still echoing in my head and twisting my heart into a thick knot.
I picked up my phone and scanned through to find his number. My finger hovered over the button, but I couldn’t make myself press it. I needed to get my statement done. He needed time to think about what he wanted. There wasn’t anything left to say tonight that could fix it or make it all clear.
With a heavy sigh, I set the phone face side down and picked up my pen.
The following morning, I made my way to Harvest House. In the excitement of passing the bar, starting my new job, and the meeting with Sam O’Brian, I’d forgotten to visit Lacey and get the video footage she’d mentioned on the flight back from New York. I doubted there was anything on the video that would help, but I hadn’t seen her since that afternoon, and with all the chaos inside my head over what to do about Ross, she was the one person I knew would understand.
I’d never been to Harvest House before, but as I pushed through the main doors, I smiled to myself, seeing that it was essentially just the way I’d pictured it in my head. Colorful, cheery, bright, and organized. All very Lacey.
“Shelby?”
I turned at Lacey’s chirpy voice and flashed a smile. “Hey!”
“Hey! I didn’t know you were coming. Did we have an appointment?” She fumbled to flip through the pages of the leather-bound planner in her hands. She was wearing a thick pair of glasses, and I noticed she wasn’t wearing makeup.
“No, do I need one?”
She breathed a sigh of relief and closed the book. “Oh, good. I thought I was losing it.”
“Late night?” I asked, arching a brow as I smiled over at her.
She giggled, and a red twinge flooded her cheeks. “Yeah. I’m sure you heard about the big win?”
“Yeah,” I said, a stab of guilt sinking into my chest. “I spoke with Ross last night.”
Lacey smiled. “Well, we had an after party, and I don’t think I got to bed until three or something. So I’m having a very Monday kind of Monday.”