Tears of Betrayal

The water turns bright red, then pink, and then clear.

‘Demitri was distracted.’

Because I fought with Alexei earlier?

Because I was there?

Because he was worried for my safety?

Guilt eats a hole in my soul, and it begins to spread like cancer.

Demitri was distracted because of me.

Hours have passed where I sit like a frozen statue next to Alexei.

Damien’s pacing a hole in the floor while Winter and Carson keep watch.

When Alexei gets up, my body mimics his, and I rise to my feet. Pins and needles spread through my legs, but they move, following Alexei down the hallway until we stop outside the room where Demitri is being operated on.

Alexei turns to me, and when our eyes meet, the raw agony between us becomes explosive, and then he grabs hold of my shoulder and yanks me against him. His arms clamp around me.

I hug Alexei back, knowing he’s the other half of Demitri’s heart.

There’s no comfort, though. Only Demitri can give me that. But there is compassion because if it feels like my world just ended, it must be so much harder for Alexei.

When the door opens, Alexei yanks back and turns his attention to the doctor.

They speak in Russian, and then Alexei takes my hand, and we get to go into the room.

The moment my eyes land on Demitri, where he’s hooked up to machines, silent tears begin to spiral over my cheeks.

Alexei moves to Demitri’s side and presses a kiss to his forehead. “You better pull through, brother. I can’t do any of this without you.”

My tears flow faster as I take in the two bandages on Demitri’s torso. The blood on the floor. The used materials.

“What did the doctor say?” I somehow manage to ask.

“We have to wait and see,” Alexei answers, his eyes not leaving Demitri.

I step closer and tentatively reach for Demitri’s hand. His skin is surprisingly warm as I wrap my fingers around his palm.

The doctor and elderly couple come back with fans, and they position them around Demitri. They say something to Alexei, then the old woman begins to rub Demitri down with a sponge.

“They need to bring down his temperature,” Alexei explains.

Damien moves to the old woman and saying something, he takes the sponge from her and continues to wipe his brother down. I stare at the younger version of Demitri, and seeing him healthy makes the cancer eat away faster at my soul.

My eyes lower back to Demitri’s face, his complexion drained of color. I don’t know for how long I stand and stare at him. I’m not sure if I’m still silently crying or not.

It’s as if my will to live is gone.

Alexei places his hands on my shoulders, and I’m forced down into a chair next to the steel slab Demitri’s lying on. Then Alexei takes a seat next to me, and pressing a hand to the side of my head, he forces me to lean on his shoulder.

My eyes don’t leave Demitri, who’s become unspeakably important to me in such a short amount of time.

Not because he kept me safe, but because I fell harder than he did. I just managed to hide it.

When I saw him at the Starbucks, there was an instant attraction. Even though we fought like cats and dogs the first couple of days we were on the island, my attraction for him became affection.

Every time he was gentle with me, placing his hand on my neck, kissing my hair or forehead, checking if I was okay – I fell harder.

Demitri was right when he said we shouldn’t label what’s between us. There’s no name for it, and every day the feelings just grow deeper. So deep it’s impossible to just call it love.

You can love someone and not trust them.

You can love someone and not feel like you’ll die if they don’t touch you.

You can love and survive if you lose them.

Closing my burning eyes, I lean more into Alexei. He places an arm around my shoulders and then presses a kiss to the top of my head, and I can almost imagine it’s Demitri, but then I open my eyes again and see him lying so still it looks unnatural.

Panic flares through me, shining a bright light on the fact that Demitri might not make it. It slams the air out my lungs, and I gasp as the most unbearable emotion I’ve ever felt flays me to the bone.

The realization that Demitri isn’t a god but a mortal and that he might die kills the last of my innocence. Coming face to face with death leaves me feeling powerless.

Please. Not Demitri.

I’ll do anything.

This man walked into my life, and he changed me forever. I can’t live without him.

God, I’ll give anything to swap places with him.

Take me instead.

Chapter 28

ARIANA

The sun has come up and set again, and even though the doctor said Demitri’s out of the woods, it doesn’t feel that way.