Wayside School Is Falling Down (Wayside School 2)

“No, you’re not weird!” said Sharie. “I’ll tell you what’s weird. What’s weird is bringing a hobo to school for show-and-tell. I’m the one who’s weird.”

“That’s not weird!” said Bebe. “What’s weird is telling everyone you have a brother when you don’t. I’m the weirdo!”

“You call that weird?” exclaimed Stephen. “I’m weird. Who else would choke himself just to look nice?”

“That’s not weird,” said Jenny. “That’s normal. Try reading a story backward. That’s weird. I’m the weird one in this class.”

“That’s a laugh!” said Rondi. “If you’re so weird, then how come you never asked Louis to kick you in the teeth? I’m the one who’s crazy!”

“No, that’s not crazy,” said Todd. “I’ll tell you what’s crazy. What’s crazy is that we all go to school on the thirtieth floor, and the bathrooms are way down on the first!”

Everyone agreed with that, even Mrs. Jewls.

Benjamin shook his head. What a bunch of weirdos! he thought. Then he smiled. He felt proud to be in a class where nobody was strange because nobody was normal.

“Oh, this must be your lunch,” said Mrs. Jewls. She gave Benjamin the white paper sack that had been sitting on her desk since Benjamin’s first day of school.

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At lunch Allison headed down the stairs. “Mark!” she exclaimed.

“Hi, Allison,” said Mark Miller. “Long time no see.” He carried a white paper sack just like Benjamin’s.

Allison was afraid she was back on the nineteenth story.

“Don’t worry,” said Mark. “Suddenly everyone realized my name was Mark Miller and not Benjamin Nushmutt. And then Miss Zarves gave me this bag and told me to take it to the hospital.”

“Is it your lunch?” asked Allison.

“Look inside,” said Mark. He handed her the bag.

Allison looked inside.

There was an ear.

Allison’s eyes lit up. “Oh, now I get it!” she exclaimed. “I understand everything! There is no Miss Zarves! See, Mac was talking about the ear, then Mark Miller, I mean Benjamin Nushmutt, said his name wasn’t Mark Miller, so that means you—”

“What?” asked Mark.

Allison suddenly looked very confused. “Never mind,” she mumbled.

For just a second Allison had understood everything, but then she lost it.

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Chapter 30

Wayside School Is Falling Down

A strong wind whooshed around the playground in the early morning before school, blowing dirt and leaves in the faces of the children.

When the bell rang, they could hardly make it from the playground to the school. The wind was blowing directly at them, pushing their hair straight back.

With every gust of wind the school building teetered one way, then tottered back the other.

As they headed up the stairs, they could feel the building sway back and forth. The higher they got, the more it swayed.