“So tell me about you,” said Kaira. “What are your big dreams? I mean, besides wanting to marry an Arab prince?”
“I don’t have big dreams,” Armpit said. “I just take small steps.”
He told her about the advice the counselor at the halfway house had given to him. The important thing was to take small steps and just keep on moving forward. “Life is like crossing a river. If you try to take too big a step, the current will knock you off your feet and carry you away.”
“That’s kind of poetic,” said Kaira.
“I didn’t make it up,” said Armpit.
“My manager tells me I need to take big steps,” she said. “I have to grab for everything I can get right now, because in a few years I could be all washed up.”
“I doubt that,” said Armpit.
“There’s this song I’m writing.” She sang again: “Britney Spears is old and gray—she turned twenty-five today. That’s really all I’ve got so far.”
“You write your own songs?”
“A couple. I wrote ‘Angry Young Man’ and ‘Damsel in Distress.’?”
For a brief second he thought about asking her the words to “Damsel in Distress” but then thought better of it. It could only lead to his embarrassment.
“And then El Genius—that’s what my manager calls himself, El Genius—he had people kind of fix them up and arrange the music. He’s such a control freak. Sometimes I think he’s the one who’s sending me the Billy Boy letters, just so he can have even more control over me. It’s an excuse for having the Doofus watch me all the time. He’s also married to my mother.”
“Your bodyguard?”
“No, my manager. But I bet he just married her to have more control over me, because he’s got a girlfriend, too. It doesn’t matter. I’m going to fire him when I turn eighteen.”
Armpit could only shake his head in wonder. She lived in such a different world.
“You’ve got nice strong hands,” said Kaira.
“They’re all calloused from digging.”
“Is that your name? Hands?”
“No.”
“Fingers? Are you the middle finger?”
Armpit dropped her hand. “I’ll tell you what. I’ll make you a deal. I’ll tell you my name, but on one condition.”
“What?”
“Whatever my name is, you have to touch me there.”
Kaira took a step backward. “I have to touch you there.”
“That’s the deal.”
She slowly looked him over, starting at his feet and working her way upward. “Ginny said it wasn’t anyplace nasty.”
Armpit shrugged.
“You are so mean.”
“Do you want to know or don’t you?”
“Okay, tell me.”