Hazel leaned over, holding the coffee mug in both hands, a cute panda on the front of it. She smiled and waved at the camera. A dozen of my viewers all chimed in with a “hey, Hazel!” having known her on the nights she’d jump in and play with me. I passed along the greetings and went back to focusing on defeating the very pissed-off dragon.
Another ding. Someone else had subscribed.
“Thank you for subscribing… Rock—”
I froze. My character was hit with a massive wall of flame, getting killed instantly.
“RockyH85.”
That bastard. He signed up to be a subscriber! It had to be him. Not only were those his initials, but that was the year he was born.
“Sam, hello? I just rezzed you, dude.” Silk, who was on screen as a glowing pink and blue elf, left my side and went to go revive someone else.
I still couldn’t focus on the game. I became camera-shy all of a sudden. The confidence I had found seemed to be a fickle mistress because that bitch bolted out of the room. All I could imagine were Rocky’s eyes watching me through his computer, doing God knew what… well, doing something I could picture quite vividly.
A message popped up on the side of my screen, and this time, the chime of a donation rose through the sound of magic and swords.
My eyes bulged out of my head. Rocky had donated seven hundred dollars with a note simply saying “new camera.”
I tried to speak, but my mouth went cotton-ball dry. Hazel must have picked up on it. She leaned over and read the screen before the notification faded away. She slapped my chest and said in a stage whisper, “Say thank you!”
It snapped me out of my daze. “RockyH, thank you so much. You really, really didn’t have to.”
My character was hit by another torpedo of fire and tar, dying instantly. Silk groaned and Icey complained, but for some reason, the viewers were finding it funny. A couple were putting two and two together, commenting about the new subscriber and how I seemed to haywire when he arrived.
“Holy shit, Sam, are you getting your dick secretly sucked or something? You can’t keep dying like this.” Icey was pissed. Silk, always the more level-headed one which probably made her the perfect healer, reassured me it was fine and that the boss was almost dead anyway, but that I seriously needed to get my shit together.
With a nervous laugh, I tried to shake off the thought of Rocky watching me, and I went back into game mode, ignoring the chat room until the boss was finally defeated and there was no chance for me to mess things up.
“Whoa, finally,” Silk said with a sigh of relief as we all rolled for the loot. There was an epic staff that had dropped, but I rolled a twenty which meant three other people after me rolled way higher. It ended up going to some random who rolled a ninety-nine.
Lucky bastard.
“Well everyone can now go back to dick-sucking or getting dick-sucked,” Icey said, his character jumping up and down in the center of my screen.
“There was no fellatio going on,” I assured everyone. “At least not on my end.”
“It sure seemed like you were dickmatized, buddy.” Icey wasn’t letting it go.
And then Hazel made things a gazillion times worse: “Oh he is. He’s been dick-whipped,” she said from my side.
“Hah!” Icey shouted into his mic. “I effin knew it.”
Silk joined the fray. “You have been pretty out of it lately. Like your head’s been in the clouds.”
“Yeah, in the sex clouds,” Icey quipped. “Those big puffy clouds that are shaped like dicks. That’s where he’s been.”
“You two are going to get me banned.” I could see how red I was getting on the camera. Now my chat room was jumping into the fray with messages like “yesss, get it Sam!” and “I knew there was a glow!” Thankfully, none of them were coming from Rocky, so I just prayed that his computer had self-combusted and he was no longer even in my chat room.
“So who is it?” Icey asked as our group teleported back to the main city. We landed in a flower-filled courtyard, with old stone buildings surrounding us, light bouncing off their stained glass windows. Someone on their glittering azure dragon mount landed right on top of me, disappearing as they logged off.
“It’s um… he’s, uh… whatever, none of your business is what he is.”
“So you aren’t going to introduce us, then?”
“Icey, stop bugging him.” Silk, once again, came to my rescue. “We have to go hand in this quest and queue up for the next dungeon. Why don’t you do that for us? I have to restock on potions.”
“Fine,” Icey said, his character mounting up on a black unicorn and riding off into town. “But I still think you should tell us who’s making you all googly-eyed.”