“Low blow, bro. You know I’d like to have children someday.”
“Sorry. It’s just….” Marcus shook his head, and Jack saw his struggle. “Never mind.”
“Say it, Marc. Whatever it is, just say it.”
“I’ve never asked for anything before.” Marcus refused to look at Jack. “I know that sounds shitty, but it’s true. I don’t get why he would be mad if you went with someone just as a friend. It’s like he doesn’t want you to win. Maybe he wants you to lose so you have to move out. That way he can visit you off campus.”
Ouch. Was that what Marcus thought? He didn’t know Ed at all—
He really didn’t know Ed at all.
How could he when Ed never dropped by just to hang out?
Marcus slumped his shoulders, and Jack sidled closer to him and pressed their shoulders together. “Ed doesn’t know I’d have to move, Marcus.”
“What?”
“I didn’t tell him that.”
“Why not? Maybe if he knew….”
“I didn’t want him to feel pressured to come. It’s his life we’re talking about. Not some stupid formal or a room.”
Marcus’s voice cracked. “Stop saying it’s just a room.”
They were so quiet Jack heard the individual ticks of the clock.
Marcus looked at him, gaze pleading. “Please take someone as a friend.”
Jack breathed heavily through his nose. He couldn’t screw his brother, the person who’d always stood by him, who always would. He wanted to yell at Marcus, but his feelings were just as valid as Ed’s.
The choice was his, and he’d lose either way.
“I’ll meet Brant.” His gut twisted sharply. “But if I get any hint that he’s expecting anything from this, I’m bailing.”
Marcus nodded slowly, then leaned over and hugged him. “Okay. And he won’t expect anything. He’s got a boyfriend back in Massachusetts.”
Jack thought he heard someone walking outside the room, but when he looked through the door, he didn’t see anyone. “When am I supposed to meet him?”
“He’s sorta close to campus now.”
Jack frowned. “Close to campus?”
“At Nessa’s coffeehouse.”
“Shit, Marcus….”
Marcus threw up his hands. “Look, he knew Billy, and those guys wanted to catch up. I might have happened to mention I liked that coffeehouse. Brant said to head over there if you wanna meet him. So, um, I’ll grab my wallet and we can go?” Marcus practically flew out of the room and up the stairs. Quick, like he didn’t want Jack to change his mind.
Jack reluctantly followed. Leaving the living room, he smacked into one of Harper’s puppets loitering in the hall. Greg grunted some obscenity under his tongue and hoofed it up the stairs.
Jack slumped all the way to his room to wait on Marcus, and then all the way across campus to the coffeehouse and Brant.
This felt all kinds of wrong.
But Marcus was his bro, always had been, and always would be.
* * *
Brant and Billy sat in the corner of the room in front of a potted tree. Billy waved them over. “Jack, Marcus. Grab a seat.”
Jack slowed his step, wishing that the crop of dark hair on the guy sitting with his back to him were Ed’s.
Brant twisted in his seat and smiled. It was wide and welcoming, and his eerie amber eyes took him in appreciatively, but Jack felt cold. A month ago, Brant would have been just his type: tall, whipcord build, with confidence that leaked from him.
It did nothing for him now.
Marcus dragged over a wooden chair from a neighboring table, and Jack did the same, twisting and straddling it, keeping the back like a wall between him and Brant.
Marcus pointed to the guy. “Jack. Brant. Brant. Jack.”
Jack half stood up and reached over. “Hey, how’s it going?”
“Good, man. You?” Brant’s handshake passed muster. No surprise.
“All right, thanks.”
“I was just telling him what a great guy you are,” Billy said.
“Don’t believe everything he says.” Jack forced a smile. “He’s got a great poker face.”
“Good to know.” Brant looked as uncomfortable as Jack felt.
No one spoke for a few seconds. The sound of Marcus pushing his chair nearly startled him. “Billy, let’s go get some coffee.”
“But I have some?” He held up his cup.
“That’s code, man.” Brant flicked his fingers at Billy. “This is awkward enough without you sitting there.”
“Oh, right.” He stood and turned to go, then reached back for his coffee. “No sense actually buying anything if it’s just code.”
Billy and Marcus moved to the counter.
Jack shook his head. “Sometimes I wonder if I brought him up well enough to survive.”
“You raised him?”
“He was my pledge brother last fall. I feel responsible for him.”
Brant’s laugh rolled off his tongue. “Billy thinks a lot of you.”
“He’s loyal, that’s for sure.” Jack wished he’d thought to get something to drink. “So… I’ve never done this.”
“What? Never met someone to take to your formal as a friend?”
“Believe it or not, I did that once.” Jack gave him a rueful laugh. “Someone asked me to go as their friend last fall.”