S.E.C.R.E.T. Revealed (Secret 3)

“When it comes to sex, apparently my shit is too together. Is that a bad thing?”

I told her it wasn’t; she was the kind of woman we all wanted to be like, at least when it came to her relationship with sex and her own body, which looked incredible tonight with a new lush layer of baby weight softening her edges. Watching her hoist and pat Neko, while teetering in heels and wearing a short, sparkly dress, I marveled at how sexy motherhood looked on her.

“Go,” I said now, gently prodding Will to greet her, the baby and her beau.

After pulling in a deep breath, Will crossed the room and gamely stuck out his hand to Carruthers, not like they were old friends or would ever become new ones, but with a kind of familiarity, like they’d fought on opposite sides of a fierce skirmish, neither truly coming out a victor. Will then turned to Tracina and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek, his eyes glued to the bundle she carried. When Tracina opened the little flap on baby Neko, Will smiled for the first time in weeks, a genuine Will smile, one that stretched from ear to ear.

In that moment, my heart broke for him. Again.

Tracina poured the baby into his arms, and he cooed and rocked her, smiling and smiling, my cue to go over and tug a now baby-free Tracina to a quiet corner.

“You look insanely great, by the way!” she said, grabbing my hands and holding them out to take in my red dress.

“You think? I feel like a fraud.”

“Stop it, it’s fucking great. Is Will still being a dickhead?” she asked, snatching a glass of wine off a passing tray. “I pumped her milk so I’m getting my drink on tonight.”

“Will’s being … well, you know, Will.”

“You want my advice? Give him a nice, wide berth. Let him remember what he’s missing.”

“We are strictly business partners, Tracina. Our chance came and went.”

She ignored me. “What I mean is, don’t be emotionally available to him, if you want him back.”

&nb

sp; “I told you we’re just—”

“Be mysterious. Be busy. Get dating again. Who was that guy you were seeing last year?”

“Which one? The musician or the pastry chef?”

She gave me the side-eye. “I did not know you were that busy.”

We laughed.

“I know you, Cassie. Everything you’re telling yourself about Will, I said it to myself about my Carr. So like I said, you really want a guy? Behave like you really don’t.”

We both looked over at Will. If you could watch a man fall instantly in love, his face would look like Will’s, the world around him melting away, the object of his affection receiving his full attention. The baby took obvious glee in his rapture, her giggle audible from where we were standing. Her hands sweetly punched at his nose and chin, until, unprompted, she started wailing and Tracina’s whole body went on high alert. On cue, Will made his way back over to us, followed by a doting Carruthers.

“Oh sure, she starts crying and it’s time to give her back to Mommy,” said Tracina.

“If I could help, I would,” Will said, reluctantly exchanging the baby for Tracina’s empty glass.

“Nah. It’s cool. She wants her mommy. And a clean diaper.” Tracina took the now-bawling Neko downstairs to the staff room, leaving the three of us standing around awkwardly for a few seconds.

“Thank you for coming,” I said to Carruthers, patting his arm.

His smile was tight. “I am always happy to support local businesses.”

Matilda arrived just then, blessedly, and I excused myself from this painful company to greet her, despite Will’s help, don’t leave expression. As I walked towards Matilda, my phone vibrated in my pocket—a text. From Jesse.

Come over after party? Finn’s asleep.

Finn? Oh right, his son. I kicked myself for not asking his name ages ago. Before I could reply, Matilda pulled me in for an embrace.

“Cassie! You look stunning.”