“Feels so good,” I purred.
Then I felt hands climb up, handling my breasts, but these hands were small and warm, and that’s when I realized Pauline was holding me from behind. As she eased down onto his cock, and he ate my pussy with increasing gratitude, she caressed and pinched my breasts. His deep, pleasurable moans sent waves through my body. She rode him behind me, using my body as leverage. As she fucked him harder and harder, she placed her dizzy, wet fingers on my ass, while Ewan’s tongue fucked me ferociously from the front.
The rush built at a feverish pace. Too fast, too much.
“Fuck, yes, yes, oh,” I screamed, my thighs split over Ewan’s face, Pauline’s fingers on me, in me, my whole body buzzing, convulsing, taking and taking, and then I came, hard, and loudly, feeling Ewan’s tongue as he began to lose it too, moaning directly into my body as Pauline rocked an orgasm out of him, taking one for herself as well. We were like a pleasure machine, feeding off one another from all angles. Hands and mouths and skin on skin, slowing to a rhythm, a beat, then a low pulse.
&nbs
p; Pauline collapsed against my back, both of us rolling off him, spent and giggly. For a few breathless moments, I lay next to him, my legs tangled in the red sheets, as Pauline curled behind me, her body smooth and small. Ewan lifted a muscular arm and laid it across both of us, protectively, gratefully, as I nestled into his chest. But I couldn’t sleep. I was wide awake.
I pointed to the door to signal to Pauline that I had to go. She blew me a sleepy kiss. As I pulled the robe around me, I listened to her sweetly debrief Ewan on bits he could improve.
“… talk about how her skin feels, and don’t just say she’s beautiful. You have to be more specific. Tell her you love her ass, how her mouth is sexy, that kind of thing. And focus more on Solange than on me. I won’t mind. Also, it’s not the time to be astonished. Try to be, like, “Yeah, man, of course two beautiful women are fucking me …”
I closed the door behind them and bolted for home, anxious for my own bed but buzzing from the top of my head down to my toes. I felt like I had had an expert massage following a vigorous workout. I was glowing, energized and ready for anything.
SOLANGE
When I put a threesome on my fantasy list, I meant it, and I was ready and willing when the day came, right up to the moment my hand reached the knob of that door in the Mansion, the one leading to a room where two people, likely a man and a woman, or it could have been two men, or hell, two women for all I knew, were waiting for me on the other side.
That’s when I froze.
In the early, heady days of my courtship with Julius, I had brought up the idea of a threesome while we were inside one of our blissful, post-coital bubbles. I remember it was hotter than hell in our little back bedroom. He had just bought an air conditioner, the window-unit kind. After he had fully installed it, brackets and all, he realized the unit was too far from the nearest plug to actually turn it on. He laughed and fell on the bed, pulling me down with him. What I saw as a sad metaphor for a man who never finished a task properly, he saw as funny, and as a chance to get me naked again.
We lived in a little rental in Bywater way before the neighborhood was cool, before a baby made spontaneous afternoon sex impossible. I was doing my master’s in journalism, singing part-time in ratty bars, and coming home to Jules’s warm, sleeping body at night. He was trying to transition out of DJing and into band management, but he wasn’t signing enough acts. We wanted to be different from our parents, and different from our friends who were rushing to the altar and buying bungalows in Uptown and Carrollton. In fact, when we finally did get married, we did it on a lunch break at City Hall, much to my mother’s consternation and my dad’s relief. I didn’t want him going into debt to pay for a wedding like it was his patriarchal duty, or some reflection on my “value” as a woman. As a couple we were artistic, progressive, expansive, bold, and that included, I thought, loosening our hold on each other so we could explore our sexual limits together. I was reading a lot of new-age relationship stuff at the time; threesomes were no big thing.
Julius was having none of it.
“So, let me get this straight. You would have no problem kissing my mouth right after I go down on another woman, making her scream right in front of you. You’d be cool with that?”
“The trick is to have no emotional attachment to the third party,” I said, quoting those books.
“Oh. I see. So I’m not supposed to give a shit about one of the two women I am with—emotionally or personally. I’m supposed to reserve feelings only for you, and my cock for her. And that makes it okay,” he said, laughing.
“Who says it’s gotta be another woman? What about if it’s me and two men?”
He laughed. Then he laughed some more.
“You have a problem with that?” I asked.
“Yeah I got a problem with that. And it’s not the problem you think. I just don’t like the idea of boiling sex down to a whole lotta limbs and lips and cocks and pussies. Why would I bother digging through a pile of flesh just to get to what I already got, here, now, all to myself?”
I lightly beat his damp chest, my sticky fingers trailing up and down his stomach, turning his laughter into shuddering as soon as my hand found him hard again.
“You talk fancy, Solange,” he said, moving his hips to my hand’s rhythm, “but you’re crazy in love with me. I know you. It would kill you to share.”
“You’re telling me you never think about another woman when you’re fucking me?”
This made his dick go harder.
“I’ll tell you what, maybe I have. Maybe I haven’t. But right now, in this moment, I’m thinking only about fucking you,” he said, pulling me in closer.
This man was mine, his dick under my command. Mine. It was fierce and sudden, that feeling of mine. His cock eased into me, while I clasped my hands behind his neck. I loved how his torso went ropy from exertion. I loved how he fucked me. I could feel that surrender, that holy thing that sex can bring to you when it’s done right, when it causes the big “yes” at the center of the flesh; the yielding that comes from feeling safe, right, wanted. It was like that with us for a long time.
And then it wasn’t.
A threesome had remained on my secret list of things to try even before Matilda provided the opportunity. The day I filled out my fantasy form, the tip of my pencil hovered over that box for a long, long time. Then I checked it. This morning, I had found myself racing around my bedroom while a limo idled in my driveway to take me to the Mansion. Six times I changed outfits! And six times I had to remind myself clothes didn’t matter; I’d be naked the whole time, right?