As they did the guys thing, I headed back to the kitchen to check on the turkey, and Josie followed.
“So…” Josie said, leaning against the counter as I carved the turkey up.
“Yeah?”
“That’s Derek Ballentine.”
“I know who it is.”
“What secrets have you been keeping from me?”
“None,” I said defensively.
She laughed. “He’s so into you, Mars. Are y’all sleeping together?”
“No!” I said quickly.
Josie crossed her arms and waited expectantly.
“Well, not anymore.”
“I knew it!” she cried.
“It was one night in college, and he ditched me afterward. I’m never going through that again. So, we’re just friends.”
“You can be friends with someone you had sex with?” She screwed up her face in confusion.
“I’m not you.”
“What does Lila think about this?”
I frowned and avoided her gaze. “Uh…”
“Oh shit! This is serious. Lila doesn’t know?”
I shook my head guiltily. “I wanted to tell her. I wanted to tell you too. But I was too embarrassed. I was such an idiot for getting sucked in by him.”
“So? It’s us,” Josie said. “Think about what Lila went through. She’d totally understand.”
“Yeah. I didn’t want to think about it. And anyway, it’s not happening with him again.”
Josie peeked her head out into the living room. “He’s making friends with your brother. He’s clearly charmed your roommate and friends. He’s dressed like a Southern gentleman on Thanksgiving. Why wouldn’t you?”
I stuffed turkey into her hands. “Because I’m not you or Lila. It’s not going to happen. He showed me who he was, and I plan to believe him the first time.”
“People can change, Mars,” Josie said gently. “I have.”
“You’re not Derek.”
“Okay,” Josie said with a shrug. “If you say so.”
“Just… don’t tell Lila.”
Josie shook her head at me. “Fine, but you owe me one.”
I hated owing Josie anything. She’d definitely collect eventually. Still, I sighed and nodded. “Fine.”
I stood outside of my lab, trying not to freeze my ass off. It was snowing, and Derek was late. I jogged in place to keep my body temperature up. Which was how Derek found me as he walked up to the lab.
“Sorry. I got hung up,” he said.
“My eyelashes have frozen, but it’s fine.”
He laughed at me and didn’t say anything. We walked back to my apartment. The sun had already gone down, and the temperatures were dipping well below freezing tonight. It was our last day on campus before winter break, and I couldn’t have been happier to be going back to Savannah.
My stomach twisted with excitement as I opened the door to my place. I’d been keeping a secret for two weeks, and it was finally time.
“Misty isn’t home?” Derek asked as he stepped out of the cold. He flicked on the light to the living room.
Everyone jumped out of their hiding spots and yelled, “Surprise!”
A Happy Birthday sign hung over the living room. All of our friends were in attendance—neuroscience and law students all mingled together.
Derek’s jaw dropped. He looked at me in shock. “You did this?”
“Yes! Happy birthday!”
Without a second thought, he picked me up and twirled me in a circle. I laughed until he set me down. Our bodies dragged together, slow and heated. His head was dipped down toward me, and I hastily stumbled backward out of his arms as everyone else came forward to wish him a happy birthday. I was glad to be out of his spotlight to get the cake out of the fridge.
We spent the rest of the night drinking cheap beer, eating the cake Misty and I had made, and watching basketball. Slowly, people dwindled out of the party, stumbling home through the snow, until it was just me and Derek in my living room. Misty was seeing Kyle now, and they’d disappeared into her bedroom some time ago. The lights were low. Derek and I sat on the same couch, as we’d been in most of the night. I could have leaned into him so easily, but I stayed rigid.
“This was a nice party,” he said.
“I’m glad you liked it. I thought it would be a fun way to send everyone off for the holidays too.”
“It was.”
I looked down at my fingernails. I’d been chewing on them lately, and they were down to the quick. “You never said what you were doing for the holidays. Lila said that Ash is having a New Year’s party on his yacht. I guess they’re talking again.”
“He mentioned that,” Derek said.
“Good idea or bad idea?”
He shrugged. “Ash isn’t exactly sane when it comes to Lila, is he?”
“No, and vice versa.”
“So… are you coming?”
His eyes found mine again. He searched for something there, like I would give him the answers to the universe. “Do you want me to be there?”
“I was just asking if you were coming.”
“No,” he said slowly. “My parents are taking us to Paris for the holiday.”
Paris. Sometimes, I forgot that Derek came from money, and then other times, he went to Paris for Christmas, like it was normal.