Southern Playboy (North Carolina Highlands 4)

What is wrong with me?

“You know,” Amelia says after an excruciating pause, “you don’t have to push me away with your bullshit. I’m already done.”

“What? I say one stupid thing, and you quit?”

She pierces me with a glare. “Yeah. Apparently, I’m good at that, but so are you. Here you are, quitting after one hard day with Liam.”

“I’m not quitting,” I snarl. “I’m doing what a good parent would do and thinking about his future.”

“That’s bullshit, and you know it.”

“You can’t run away from this, A.” Which makes no sense because I know I’m pushing her away. I fucking know I’m contradicting myself.

Then again, none of this adds up. Not the way I’m acting or the decisions I’m making or the how I’m making her feel.

“But you can run away from me real easy, huh?” She bends down to pick up a pile of clothes. She stuffs them into her bag, and something about seeing her shirts and dresses all wrinkled makes a lump form in my throat. “I should’ve known this would never work out.” She laughs, a brittle sound. “God, I really am an idiot.”

“Amelia, please.”

She tears the bag’s zipper up its center. “I should go before Liam wakes up. I’ll ask around for a replacement for y’all.” Hiking the bag over her shoulder, she turns toward the door.

Something about the proud set of her shoulders, the way she holds her head high despite the nasty things I’ve just said—it makes me panic. She’s excellent. She deserves better.

What’s the right call here? Asking her to stay and fight? Or letting her go?

“So what?” My heart hiccups inside my chest. “So what if I play another couple years? We’ll be back in Asheville often enough. Holidays. The off-season. What the hell is so wrong with me taking the extension?”

Amelia whirls around, mouth set in a hard, straight line. “It’s wrong because it shows your priorities are still out of whack. I’m not waiting around for you to figure your shit out. I know what I want, and this?” She gestures back and forth between us. “This isn’t it. You’re free to take all the time in the world to dick around and feel sorry for yourself. But I’m not gonna let you take my time. And I’m not going to watch Liam spend the next few years missing his dad because you’re too busy playing football. I know what it’s like to grow up without a dad, Rhett—you do too—and it’s not fun. But at least you had your brothers and sister. A mom who didn’t die when you were sixteen. But I was literally orphaned. You’re all that little boy has right now.”

Oh fuck. Fuck, fuck, how do I—

“But you’ve made your choice, Rhett. It’s obvious nothing’s changed.”

“I have changed,” I say fiercely.

“If that’s true, prove it to your son. If he doesn’t make you change your mind about putting your brain and your body at risk, well.” She smiles tightly, tears leaking out of her eyes. “That tells us everything we need to know, doesn’t it?”

I’m not that man.

Aren’t I, though?

“I hate that you’re making me choose,” I say.

She looks at me for a beat, lifting her hand to wipe underneath her eyes. “I hate that you think it’s even a choice. You’re breaking my heart, Rhett. You’re breaking everyone’s hearts by doing this.”

I swallow the lump in my throat. “I’m sorry.”

“I am too.” Amelia looks down at her hands. “I knew taking this job was a bad idea from the get-go. I should’ve never accepted the offer, and I definitely shouldn’t have let things go so far.”

I shake my head, crossing my arms because I’m afraid I’ll reach for her if I don’t. The longer this fight lasts, the more I’m convinced letting her go is the right thing to do.

I’m so fucking bad at doing the right thing.

“Don’t blame yourself.” My voice cracks. I clear my throat. “It’s my fault. But if you’d just consider—”

“No.” She flattens her palm on the center of my chest. “Don’t take this out on Liam, okay? He’s a good boy. You’re lucky to have him. Make sure he’s lucky to have you too.”

“Rhett?” Mom’s voice floats down the stairs. “Rhett, is that you? Is everything all right?”

“I should go,” Amelia whispers.

Now I’m crying too. Sniffing, I say, “I wish you wouldn’t.”

“I’m going to ask you not to reach out,” she says. “We have to make this a clean break. Liam . . . I love him, but . . .”

I nod. My throat is so tight I can’t breathe. “Right. Okay. I don’t know what the fuck we’re gonna do without you, but okay.”

She pats me once on the chest. “You’re gonna keep going.”

She turns and walks out of my room.

Walks out of my life. For good this time.

Chapter Thirty-Three