Facing West (Forever Wilde 1)

“Doesn’t he have a girlfriend? Chloe, I think. What’s that all about? Is he bi or just in denial?”

I chuckled. “Hell, Nico, that guy’s still so deep in the closet he’s never coming out. Every so often he’ll say something that insinuates we should hook up for old time’s sake. It’s pathetic really. If it’s his conservative upbringing that keeps him closeted, why won’t the guy just move somewhere he can be comfortable in his own skin? I don’t get it.”

Nico shifted so he was sitting up on the sofa between my spread legs and met my eyes. His blue-green ones were steely, and the lines were back between his brows. “You ever hook up with him after that night?”

I thought about lying to him, but I didn’t. “Once. In a moment of weakness.”

“What happened?”

“I dated this guy named Xavier in medical school. His family lives here in Hobie, so one Christmas shortly after we broke up, he was home visiting his parents. I ran into Xavier and felt melancholy I guess. Horny too, if you want to know the truth. We were at Doc and Grandpa’s big holiday party. They host practically the whole town for an eggnog and Christmas cookie thing every year, and afterward, people stick around and start a bonfire out back if the weather’s right for it.

“Well, I proceeded to drown my sorrows after seeing Xavier, and later that night when Curt made his snarky little innuendos about a repeat performance from high school, I called his bluff. Took him around back of the bunkhouse and…” I trailed off, not wanting to go into detail.

“And?”

“You don’t really want to hear this shit, do you, Nico?” I asked with a sigh.

“Well, no. But I want to know. Was it just oral sex, or did you fuck him?”

I saw his defiance in the familiar set of his jaw, his upturned chin, and his flinty eyes. My hands slid across his cheeks to hold him still.

“Nico,” I said quietly. “It was a mistake. One I regret, and one that happened years ago.”

“Figures,” he ground out. “That fucking asshole.”

“Now do you see the other reason he’s pissed at you?” I asked with a smile.

“Because I won’t fuck him behind someone’s goddamned barn like some people I know?”

God, he was cute when he was pissed off. I really loved angry Nico.

“Because the whole town knows you’re the one I want,” I said firmly.

He rolled his eyes and scoffed. “A prime example of the slim pickings around here.”

I tightened my hold on his face. “You know, Nico, you need to decide—are you going to be pissed at me or feel sorry for yourself? Which is it? Because I’m sitting here looking at the start of something pretty special, yet you seem convinced either you’re not worthy or I’m not worthy. And believe it or not, both of those options make me feel pretty damned shitty.”

His eyes opened wider as I spoke.

“I know you’re not looking for something permanent, Nico. And I know you’re leaving soon. But can we just be together for a little while without all this other crap? Even if it’s just for tonight. Be with me here, Nico. Trust that I choose to have you here tonight with me because I like you and want you. And for tonight at least, let me believe I deserve it too.”

He seemed to deflate before my very eyes, but then he smiled. It was soft and sweet and made my heart flip-flop. But it told me all I needed to know.

Nico was mine for the night, and it was time to take him to bed and show him how glad I was to have him there.

Chapter 35

Nico

When I returned home the next day, Griff burst out laughing the minute I walked through the door.

“What?” I asked.

Rebecca turned to look at me from where she was washing some breakfast dishes at the kitchen sink.

“You look a bit postcoital, Nicolas,” she teased.

“You look positively ravished,” Griff said with a giant grin on his face. “Tell me everything.”

I felt my cheeks ignite and tried to fan them with my hands as I snuck back to peek in on Pippa. She’d rolled onto her belly and had her big fat diaper butt in the air with her knees tucked under her tummy and her feet crossed. God, she was adorable. I watched her sleep for a few minutes before risking running a finger over the little shell of her ear. Her lips were smacking lightly in a sleepy nursing movement, and I could see the barest tip of her tongue through a small gap between her lips.

When I walked back out to the main room, Rebecca and Griff were settled on the sofa with their coffee.

“So?” Griff prompted.

“I think I need to go back to San Francisco,” I confessed. “If I stay here any longer, I won’t be able to leave.”