Above and Beyond (Twist of Fate 4)

Zach stood, took another swig, then slowly approached me. A few weeks ago, the intimidating move would have had me quaking with fear and excitement. Admittedly there was some excitement because unfortunately there was just no turning off my body’s desire for Zach. But I wasn’t in the least bit afraid of the man.

“No boyfriends or husbands, current or past,” Zach said.

“Calvin,” I said with a nod of my head.

“He’s the one, right? The first kiss?”

“He is.”

I didn’t miss the slight tic in Zach’s jaw. He took another drink from the bottle, then handed me the phone. “I guess rules are meant to be broken.”

“Just like some rules are made up after the fact.”

“I didn’t—” Zach began, but I cut him off.

“Of course, rules don’t mean shit if you don’t actually enforce them.” I tucked my phone in my pocket.

“I don’t under—”

I held up my hand, effectively cutting Zach off again. I ticked off my fingers as I spoke.

“No kissing or sweet words; me having to watch and wait for your order to breathe after I’ve taken your cock down my throat; you’d come before me, maybe even more than once; on my back, on my knees, or on my stomach for as long and as hard and as fast as you want it.” I dropped my hand and stepped closer to Zach so my front was practically pressed up against his. “You’ve kissed me so many times I have no hope of counting. And I don’t know what world you live in, but endearments like baby and sweetheart are, in fact, sweet. You’ve shoved your gorgeous cock down my throat but go ahead and try to deny that I’m in control when that happens. And you’ve never once made me hold off on my pleasure while you take yours. In fact, I think there’ve been plenty of times where you’ve made me come more than once before you came.”

I stroked my fingers down Zach’s sternum. “Oh wait, there was more though. Yeah, that’s right, you made sure to explain how we wouldn’t be spending the night together and that there wouldn’t be a repeat.” I paused until I was sure Zach was watching my every move. “I think we both know how those rules turned out. But interestingly enough, there wasn’t a thing in there about past and present boyfriends.”

Zach’s jaw hardened. He lifted the bottle to take another drink, but I intercepted it. I stepped away from him and set it on the table in the room.

“All those rules are supposed to keep the people you’re with from developing feelings for you, but I think it's the opposite. I think they’re meant to protect you, to keep you from ending up with another Mitch.” I turned around and for the first time since I’d stepped into the room, my resolve faltered.

“I only wanted to be with you, Zach. That’s all,” I admitted. “Pretty stupid, huh?” I felt tears prick the backs of my eyes. “I knew telling you I loved you wouldn’t be enough. I had to show you. That asshole said the words to you all the time, I bet. So they don’t mean anything. I was so sure you’d feel it every time I touched you. That you’d hear it in my voice and see it in my eyes. I thought if I just had enough time, I could undo what that man made you believe about yourself.”

The tension in Zach’s body was so tight, I was sure he’d shatter into a thousand pieces at any moment.

“What do you want, Lucky?” he asked, the words clipped.

“I wanted you to know that I would have fought for us, Zach. I would have kept our relationship under wraps for as long as you wanted, because I knew it wasn’t the same as it was when I was with Davis or any of those other guys. You were never ashamed to be with me and despite what you told your brother, I know what we had wasn’t just about sex for you. But you won’t fight for us, will you? You trust me to do my job right, but you don’t trust me with your heart, do you?”

I wasn’t surprised when Zach didn’t answer me. Nor was I surprised that he hadn’t reacted in any kind of way. There was no emotion in his eyes whatsoever.

And that was how I knew I’d completely lost him.

“Call your brother,” I said softly as I searched my pockets for my keys. “Luckily, he doesn’t believe any of that bullshit about you using me for sex, but he deserves to know why you keep pushing him away.”

I turned to go but when Zach softly called my name, my heart flip-flopped crazily in my chest.

“I owe you a kiss goodbye,” Zach murmured.

It was all I could do not to lose it right there and then. I doubted Zach was trying to be cruel but whatever his reasoning, it was taking every bit of strength I had left to walk out of that room without begging the man to give me… us… another chance.