Say You'll Be Nine

“Dude, it’s like a two-hour procedure at most, and it’s done under general anesthetic. He’ll be fine. I think his part of it is even outpatient.”

He didn’t understand. It didn’t matter how long the procedure was once he was under, it mattered how they got him under in the first place.

“He’s going to freak out. He has that fainting response to needles where he gets pale and stuff.”

Eli picked his hammer back up and hopped back on the ladder. “He’s a big boy, Nine. He’ll be fine.”

He was right, of course. But there was a difference between being fine and being good. As I got back to work, I thought about Cooper’s little family. With both boys in the hospital, would his mom have any support? Would she even have anyone to bring her food and hold her hand while she waited? And how was her own employer handling the time she needed off work?

After an hour of more repairs to the timber, I finally couldn’t stand it any longer.

Nine: I heard about Jacks. Is he okay?

The dots seemed to take forever to turn into words.

Cooper: They got the bleeding under control. As soon as he’s strong enough to start the chemo to kill off his bone marrow, they’ll do the transplant.

My stomach twisted, and my brain couldn’t stop mentally packing a bag.

Nine: Do you need me there? I can be there in three hours.

This time the dots took ten years.

Cooper: I’m fine, but thank you.

I stared at the text. Of course he was. He was always fine.

Fuck fine.

I gathered up my tools and took them inside the cabin to where the bigger toolbox was. Suddenly, I had clarity I’d never experienced before. When you loved someone, you showed up regardless of whether or not they wanted you there. I already knew that from years of being part of my big family. It was something I’d taken to heart at a very young age thanks to my parents setting the example.

When you loved someone, you showed up.

“Eli,” I shouted. “Let’s go. We’re packing up and heading to Caswell. You’re going to be there for Coop whether you like it or not, and I’m going to… I don’t know. Mow his mom’s lawn or learn how to cook a casserole. Something. Get your ass in gear.”

He clattered his way down from the ladder and poked his head into the cabin with a giant, shit-eating grin. “Little bro has a bossy side. Who knew?”

I cleaned up and secured all the tools and valuable supplies inside the cabin, taking advantage of the new dead bolt locks. Then I went to the RV and packed everything that needed packing. Finally, I was ready to go.

Eli gave me a big, clap-on-the-back hug before whistling for the dogs to load up.

When I finally got on the road, I felt lighter. At least this way he’d have Eli to hold his hand, and I would find a way to make myself useful behind the scenes. Maybe I could even help out at the bakery or do some laundry—anything at all to make their lives easier while Jacks was going through this.

When I got partway down the mountain, I followed Eli into the gas station at Shale Falls to fill up the tank. On a whim, I put in an order for a pizza next door. It would be after seven at night by the time we got to Caswell, but if Coop was hungry, I knew he’d like the pizza even if it was cold. Eli could take it to him at the hospital.

While I was waiting for it to be ready, my phone rang. It was Cooper.

“Hey,” I said tentatively, wondering if Eli had told him I was coming and this was Cooper calling to tell me not to.

I could tell right away he was crying, which immediately shot my heart rate into the stratosphere. His voice sounded small and afraid which set my teeth on edge. “Isaac? I don’t know if I can do this.”

“You can. You absolutely can.”

His voice was a hoarse whisper. “I’m scared.”

My heart couldn’t take it. “Eli’s on the way. He’ll be there in a couple of hours. Did something else happen?” I was almost too afraid to ask.

He sniffed. “No, I’m just scared, and… and I don’t want to be alone… and—” His voice was breaking, and with it, my heart.

“Shh, it’s okay, sweetheart. Eli’s on his way.” I couldn’t bring myself to tell him I was coming too. What if that upset him even more? Or what if this was just a temporary moment of fear and he’d regret having me there? “Is your mom there?”

“Mm-hm. She’s in with Jacks right now, but they’re making us take turns and wear all this protective gear since his immune system is being shut down for the transplant. They said one bad infection and he could be in real trouble. It’s freaking me out.”