Taming the Alpha (Alma Venus Shifter Brides 4)
Page 24
“I… I know that story. Avelyn told me. Well, at least part of it.”
Avelyn had intentionally omitted to tell her friends that Karl had been the one who killed Sabine’s family, which had led to Max finding her in the debris, taking pity on her and giving her a new home. Later, Sabine went insane because, as a shifter, she couldn’t have children. Max didn’t know what to do when she got dangerous, and locked her up in the dungeons, where Avelyn found her. And all hell broke loose. It led to the battle at Alma Venus and the school almost being burned down to the ground by dragon fire.
Karl finally looked at his bride.
“I destroyed the lives of so many people. Strangers and family alike. It took years for my Dark Wolves to make peace with what they all did that night. It helped that they knew they weren’t in control. But I was. Or, I should have been. Then Sabine and Max… She became a wolf-shifter because of me, then lost her mind because of all the pain she had gone through. She almost killed Avelyn, my brother’s mate, and their unborn child. What happened after Sabine was turned was all my fault. It wasn’t on her, and it wasn’t on Max. It was all on me. If I hadn’t lost it that night, if I had stayed with Max and his pack, if I hadn’t let my anger get the best of me…”
“It’s all over now,” Claudia said soothingly.
Karl shook his head.
“It’s not. What I did haunts my every breathing moment. I still haven’t learned how to control my wolf. You saw me yesterday… You saw me, and you were frightened. I don’t blame you. I don’t blame you for wanting to leave, because I know I can snap at any time. Yesterday, I changed almost involuntarily. This… this overwhelming anger took hold of me and I couldn’t fight it. I wasn’t strong enough. Claudia, I could hurt you!”
She took a deep breath and cupped his face. For a second, she thought he would push her away, but he surprised her by leaning into her touch.
“You weren’t angry at me, were you?”
“No. God, no! I could never be angry at you! I was angry at myself. I was angry because I knew you were right and I was acting like a jerk. I was angry because… I wanted to say ‘yes’ to your suggestion, and I couldn’t. I wanted to say ‘yes’ to the mating ritual and the cure, but that would have been so wrong and selfish of me. It was selfish enough that I bought you before telling you the truth about who I am. I should have told you when you stepped into that office. That interview should have been about me.”
“You would never hurt me,” she whispered. “You didn’t hurt me yesterday, and you will never do it.”
“You don’t know that.”
“But I do. Isn’t that why you became an adviser to the councilor of the wolf faction?”
His eyes widened in surprise. Yes, that was why he had decided to be a diplomat and help keep the peace between all the factions. Oh, he would have loved to spend his life at Schloss Blackmane, in the Black Forest Mountains, where he could shift whenever he wanted, walk around naked if he so pleased, and disappear in the woods for days, maybe weeks. How could she read him so well?
“Yes,” he whispered. “It was the only way I could learn control. Living in a big city full of humans, in a cramped apartment…”
The apartment was far from cramped, but Claudia understood how much more space his wolf actually needed to feel free and unrestrained.
“You say you’re the same man, that you haven’t changed,” she continued, now stroking his cheeks with her thumbs. “You’re wrong. For 100 years, you’ve been fighting to subdue your wolf, to be more human. You’ve dedicated all your time and energy to your work in the Council. You’re not the same man, Karl. You’ve made so many sacrifices… I think it’s safe to say you’ve long atoned for your sins. And I wouldn’t even be the only one saying it. I know your family and all the members of your clan think the same.”
Karl closed his eyes for a second and allowed himself to enjoy Claudia’s soft touch. Her small hands felt so nice on his skin. It was new, too. Since that night, he hadn’t let anyone touch him like that.
“And yesterday,” she said. “Yesterday, you had everything under control. You didn’t let your wolf take over. Remember what you did? You ran up on the terrace and paced for a while. If you had been the same man, you would have stormed out of the apartment and run down the streets, probably growling at anyone who dared stand in your way.”
Karl smiled. Yes, the thought had crossed his mind while in his wolf form.
“But you didn’t do it, and that’s all I need to know to make my decision to spend the rest of my life with you.”
He finally opened his eyes and stared at her. He couldn’t believe his story hadn’t scared her away. He couldn’t believe she was still there, holding his face between her hands, still wanting to become a hybrid for him.
“Claudia, you don’t know what you’re saying.”
“Oh, but I do. Listen to me: I love you, and I love you just the way you are. What you did is now in the past, and it will never go away, you’ll never forget or forgive yourself, but you don’t have to deal with it alone either. I’m here now, okay? We can do this together.”
He covered her hands with his and pressed a kiss to each of her palms.
“You’re more than I deserve,” he said.
She smiled. “I’m exactly what you deserve.”
He pulled her in a tight embrace and buried his nose in the crook of her neck. She was soft, warm, and so small. It was so easy to hurt her that he was afraid a single wrong move on his part could break a bone in her body. That was why he had never wanted a mate. Protecting a human female, then protecting their cubs… that was a job for a man and an Alpha he didn’t believe he was. Not until now, at least. Apparently, Claudia could convince him of anything.
After a while, she pulled away and held him at arm’s length.
“Now tell me about those scars on your back. What happened? I thought werewolves heal quickly and completely.”