He raised his gaze, wanting to give Jason the respect of looking him in the eyes when he turned him down. Right away, he realized that had been a mistake. But once he connected with that dark gaze, he couldn’t turn away. Jason’s eyes were why he had agreed to take him home the last time. Deep, intelligent, lonely eyes.
“I only do one-time things, so I get that,” Jason admitted without letting go of Abe’s hand and without walking away. He moved his thumb back and forth over Abe’s wrist. “I shouldn’t have come over here, shouldn’t have asked you to go to bed with me again, but….”
Abe looked at him and waited for him to finish the sentence. “But?” he repeated.
The sides of Jason’s mouth turned up, and he shrugged. “But I want you.”
That feeling was most definitely mutual, and it had Abe questioning whether he should follow his gut, ignore his brain, and take Jason home again. They’d already had sex once, what difference would another time make? It was an excuse, a rationalization, and he knew it. Torn, he bit his lip and looked at Jason, hoping for… something.
“You promised me another round and then you fell asleep,” Jason reminded him. “So actually, this would be a continuation of the other night.”
“Are you saying we only had half last time, so there’s another half before we exhaust the one time?”
“If that’s what I meant, would it convince you to say yes?”
Abe taught math for a living, so he had to smile at that particular type of cajoling. “I think it might.” He turned his palm and clutched Jason’s hand.
“Oh, good. I’m glad I went with that instead of my other convincing idea.”
“What was the other one going to be?” Abe asked.
Jason cleared his throat and in an exaggeratedly seductive voice said, “Hey, sugar. I have a box of condoms that’s about to expire and I’d hate to throw it in a landfill. Do you want to come save the planet with me?”
Abe barked out a laugh. “That definitely wouldn’t have worked.”
“No?” Jason smiled at him. “Then I’m glad I went with the first one.”
Abe was glad too. “You drove again?”
“Yes. And like last time, I just got here, so I’m sober.”
Hearing that Jason remembered what he’d said two months prior made Abe feel less like a disposable hookup and more like a human being who mattered at some level. His tension eased.
“Give me a minute to tell my friends I’m leaving, and then I’ll meet you out front.” Abe started to walk away but stopped when Jason didn’t release his hand. He glanced down at their joined fingers and then up at Jason.
“It’s pretty crowded in here. Maybe you should text them instead.”
After a few seconds of frowning as he wondered what Jason was up to, Abe’s chest clenched in sympathy. “You’re worried I’m making an excuse and I won’t come back.”
“No, I’m not,” Jason said, but the fact that he averted his gaze and the gulping motion of his Adam’s apple belied that statement. “Like I said, it’s crowded in here.”
“Okay,” Abe agreed as he fished his phone out of his pocket. “I’ll text them.” Jason let go of his hand, and Abe looked down at his phone, shielding his pleased smile from Jason’s view. He didn’t want to make the gruff guy think he was laughing at him. “All done,” he said once he’d sent the message and neutralized his expression. “My place again?”
Jason nodded, put his hand on Abe’s lower back, and steered them toward the door.
THE CAR ride to his apartment was strangely normal. Like last time, Abe spent most of the time rambling nervously. Jason was quiet, and it hadn’t escaped Abe’s attention that he didn’t share many details about himself, like, for example, his last name. But Abe learned bits and pieces of information—Jason was a doctor, he liked classical rock music, he loved red meat but tried to eat chicken and fish instead for health reasons, he enjoyed cooking but didn’t do much of it. None of the details were earth-shattering, but together they sketched a picture of the strong, stoic man whose eyes showed hidden vulnerability.
Knowing something about the person he was going to have sex with made Abe a little less nervous. The memory of how good it had been helped too. So this time around, when Jason pulled into his parking lot, Abe didn’t hesitate to get out of the car. They walked to the apartment side by side, brushing against each other more often than not.
Once they were inside with the door closed and locked behind them, Abe looked up at Jason. The light from one table lamp provided the only illumination in the room and left portions of Jason’s face in shadows. Abe ran his fingers over Jason’s prominent jawline and stepped closer.