But there was a flash of something serious in his eyes when he’d asked her not to tell. Like he was afraid of what losing her family might do to him. Like it’d hurt him…or ruin him.
With a final look down her body, he took a deep breath, and just for a moment she thought he might be struggling to pull himself away. “See ya around, darlin’.”
She nodded. Yeah. She would see him around. And she’d be forced to remember that the irritating son of a bitch had given her a taste of the no-excuses kind of passion she’d been looking for. If she knew what was good for her, she’d avoid him like the plague until this itch for him went away. Because a woman only had so much willpower. And if she didn’t stay away from him, she’d make another mistake she couldn’t take back.
Chapter Three
What the fuck was I thinking?
East walked into the local search and rescue office. It’d taken an extra-long shower this morning to get all the frosting off, and he still was pretty sure he smelled like vanilla…and like Natalie.
He scratched his head and pulled the back of his hair hoping the sting of pain would get it through his thick skull that he’d fucked up. But that sting only reminded him of how last night Natalie had yanked on the same strands while he was buried inside her.
Jesus, he needed to get a damn grip.
What the hell had come over him? Natalie was Matt’s sister. She’d been the runt and an annoying fixture since they were all kids. She was beyond off-limits, to say the least. And not only had he fucked her last night, he’d fucked her hard. Repeatedly. And she’d fucked him back.
“It was the dress,” he said as he made his way to the small table in the corner where the coffee pot was. “Yep, just the dress,” he decided.
Because he sure as shit had never once looked twice at her in the past. Not when she’d stood behind the counter and frosted cupcakes while absently biting her plump bottom lip and quietly humming to herself. He’d never even looked twice on the occasions when she’d walked through Honey’s bar in that damn pair of jeans she had that hugged her ass perfectly, while her thick ponytail swung with every stride. And he’d certainly never thought of pulling that ponytail while he bent her over and fucked her from behind.
Nope. Not. Once. Not ever had he ever had any of those fantasies.
But her and that dress, and that need she was radiating, were too much to deny. Because Natalie had been needing a man. And that was something he couldn’t ignore.
He yanked open the bag of coffee, dumped a bunch into the filter, and stomped through the office to the back sink to fill the carafe. He hated that dress the whole way to and from the faucet, and he hated it even more as he jammed his thumb on the brew button.
It had been that damn dress last night. That was the culprit, together with her perfect curves, which were hard not to notice. Normally, she was covered in an apron. But damn she looked good. She was a beautiful woman, don’t get him wrong, but last night she just…
She’d needed a man.
Everything from her body language to the idiot she’d been with had told him what she’d wanted, and she was going to get it, even if that meant being reckless. He’d hoped to keep her safe. Instead he’d ended up being reckless with her.
Could he have been any more pathetic trying to keep it cool this morning? Of course she wouldn’t tell Matt. Not just for herself, but because that could ruin his lifelong friendship, not to mention the dynamic of the only family he’d ever known. Her family. Lord knew he’d never be good enough in Lemon-Anne’s eyes, and Natalie had to know that, too. She wouldn’t say anything, and neither would he. But what she had said was pricking his mind.
She wanted distance.
What the hell did that mean? He saw her all the time. And surely she couldn’t mean it in the way he meant it when he used it as part of some bullshit excuse to one of his one-night stands. No woman had ever wanted distance from him before.
He really was a son of a bitch. Or his ego was extra-sensitive today. No way in hell would he stand there and think about why he was so annoyed about this. And he sure as shit wasn’t going to go into mommy issues of abandonment, and commitment phobia. Lots of people had shitty parents. His had just happened to be one of the worst. He was lucky his mom had taken off when he was so young. Sure, seeing her passed out with blood running from her nose and foam from her mouth wasn’t exactly a pleasant memory. But there had only been a few times like that. And then she’d died so soon after.
He closed his eyes for a second and remembered the day he’d found out. He’d already been living with Matt and Natalie, but at that point, he’d assumed it was a temporary arrangement. Eventually, his mom would come back. Eventually, he’d return to living in that dark and empty house, his mom drunk or high or…
But she hadn’t come back. And as crushed as he’d been to hear that her addictions had finally gotten the best of her, his entire life had turned into one worth living when Natalie’s family had taken him in.
And now he’d betrayed their trust. His only saving grace was that he was never going to let them find out, and he was never going to let this happen again.
“Fuck this,” he muttered, and poured a cup of coffee. The drip wasn’t done, and when he removed the pot, it continued to pour and spilled onto the t
able. He shook his head and replaced the pot. He wasn’t thinking straight.
He needed to clear his mind, and fast. Because he couldn’t, and wouldn’t, deviate from the boundaries that kept him safe. Hell, the boundaries that kept Natalie safe, too. He’d seen the hurt in her eyes when he’d left her this morning. But fuck, she knew as well as he did that last night had been a mistake.
A wonderful and terrible mistake he couldn’t stop thinking about.
Yep, I’m an asshole.
For once, he should have kept his dick in his pants. Hopefully Natalie would just move on, and so would he, and they’d go back to irritating each other, and this whole thing would fade away.