Yours Completely (Reign 2)

“I’m not Jack,” he said once more, “And I’m not going to be your dark corner either.”

I frowned. But he went on.

“I know Jack hurt you, and yes, he’s my best friend. I know what’s ahead of me when it comes to you, and it’s not going to be easy. We may have some common ground, but we’re different people. If you want to hide, I can’t help with that or allow it.” His thumb traced my cheekbone. “But if you want to run? Fight? Feel something?” One more step and my legs had to spread slightly to welcome him into my space. “That’s my department all day long.”

His sly grin was sexy but serious, and made me want to do all those things at the same time. Run away, fight with him, feel something. Because there was an anger deep in me too. And I wanted to unleash it.

He was right, though. The shadow that had served as my protection, my hideout, had been Jack. The corner of my world that he had sheltered and controlled. That carried heat and a safe place that pushed my limits to accept my strength.

But that wasn’t Cal.

“It’s up to you, Lana. But understand that whatever is going on, whatever shit you need to work out regarding Jack, I’m here. I want to hear about it.”

“I’m mad,” I whispered. “I feel like I’m not the same person I was.”

“Because you’re not. But that doesn’t have to be a bad thing.”

I shook my head. This whole moment was ridiculous. Thinking of Jack, talking about it, was something I avoided. Because his memory did what it always did.

It upset me and made me realize for the millionth time that my strength had come with a price. I’ve given away part of myself. Trusted him. Loved him. And he healed a piece of my heart. He also took that part with him when he left.

I may be less than I was, but I was stronger. And I was not interested in letting someone else exercise their needs over me. Once upon a time, I’d liked it. Liked how I was taken over. Craved it even.

Not anymore. It was my time to exercise my needs. And I needed to stop feeling. Stop the hollow pain that was taking over.

“It is up to me,” I said in a low tone I didn’t recognize. “And I don’t want to feel any of this.”

If I was going to feel something, damn it, it would be something good. And it wouldn’t have anything to do with Jack or his memory. It would be mine. My actions. My emotions. My control.

Cal stared at me hard. “What do you see when you look at me?”

The question was so blunt, so honest, I couldn’t escape it. I gazed into his blue eyes and wondered for the thousandth time what my life would have been like if I’d met Cal first. So many doubts and unknowns. But in that moment, the answer to his question was suddenly clear.

“I see my next mistake.”

Without thinking, I grabbed his shirt in my fist, and kissed him hard.

His hand slipped to my nape and he pulled me into him until my lips mashed further against his. I moaned, instantly recognizing him from all those months ago. But this time it wasn’t soft, it was heavy and intoxicating. His free arm wrapped around my waist and pulled me into him, my legs spreading wide until my skirt bunched enough to give room for him to be flush against me.

Every part of him was hard, strong, and surrounded me. I didn’t reach out, didn’t cling to him the way I wanted, because that would be too much. I wouldn’t reach out for anyone again. It wasn’t a smart action, and I’d learned that reaching only gave room for them to pull away.

So, I kissed him, keeping my hand locked on the center of his chest, grabbing only the soft cotton there. I leaned in as h

e worked his mouth over mine, his tongue seeking and dueling. He pulled me even closer. The thick material of his fire pants scratched the insides of my thighs, and God damn, it felt good. Even better was his hardening cock that hit just the right spot and had me seeing stars behind my closed eyes.

I bit his lip and thrust my tongue hard. Deeper. The wantonness that lay dormant in me was rousing. With every touch, every taste, I awakened a little more. Wanted more. Wanted him.

His stubble rubbed against my chin, delivering a delicious sting as he dove his tongue in deep, tasting everything I was. I itched to wrap my arms around him and pull him closer.

But I stayed strong. Kept my distance.

He plunged again, and it felt like his mouth was showing exactly what his body could do to mine. He retreated to bite my bottom lip, then thrust deep once more. The burn of his skin against mine and the consuming way he kissed me was dizzying.

I pulled back, and on a heavy breath asked, “Do you ever wonder what would have happened if you hadn’t gotten called to a fire the night we met?”

“Every damn day.”

My scalp prickled and my throat closed up. He thought about it. Just as much, maybe more than I did. But where did that leave us?