“Yes, we have. I get it. I understand your priorities. Clearly.” He stressed the last word. “What I don’t understand is you.”
“I don’t want you to understand me,” I said softly. “Because it doesn’t matter.”
His face softened. “It matters to me, angel.” He walked around his desk, his tone understanding, and made me want to believe him so bad. “You’ve been hurt. I’ve known this for a while but until the other night, I didn’t know the extent.” Something dark flashed in his eyes. “I don’t know the details, but I saw your face. Felt you tremble. I understand how hard it is to trust.”
On that admission, I looked at him and saw so much pain, the kind you got from firsthand experience of having your heart ripped out.
“I wouldn’t hurt you, Paige.”
And once again, I wanted to believe him. What was worse, I wanted to tell him the same thing. I’d gotten just enough details from him to realize just how betrayed he’d been in the past. How much he’d lost. I couldn’t offer any kind of future. Not only was I not one of the women on his list, but I wasn’t the kind of woman he, or his family, was looking for.
I wasn’t a family person. Leo may want me or say he wouldn’t hurt me, but in the end, we’d part ways. And at least for me, I was beyond amicable. He was another man in my life that wielded power over me, yet I almost trusted him not to burn me with it.
“Is there anything else I can do for you before I head out for the day?” I said.
Disappointment laced his face. Whether it was because I didn’t want to talk about the other night or whatever, I couldn’t bear to look at him.
“No. Thank you, Paige. Have a good weekend.”
I knew right then, that wasn’t bound to happen.
“Are you a reporter?” The older woman, who I assumed was Jane’s mother, sneered at me upon opening the door.
“No, ma’am. I worked with Jane. I just wanted to stop by and bring her this.” I held up a small plant and her mother eyed it warily.
“If you’re trying to get more information out of her . . .”
“I’m not, ma’am.” I glanced down. Truth. Stick to the truth. “I was Bill’s personal assistant and I know the kind of man he is. I just wanted to tell Jane that she’s not alone.”
Jane’s mother’s eyes softened and she took the plant and let me in. Though she looked to be in her mid-forties, the dark circles under her eyes and pale tint to her skin made me think she had been through a lot. Jane had mentioned her mother battling cancer and I hoped she was at least on the path to recovery, but I didn’t know and didn’t want to ask.
She led me to Jane’s room, knocked once, and opened the door. Jane was sitting on her bed, reading a book, when she looked up and saw me.
“Paige?”
I smiled. “Hi.”
“I’ll be right outside,” her mother said. “Would you like something to drink, Paige?”
“No, thank you.”
She nodded and shut the door behind her.
“I suppose you’re here because you heard,” Jane said, looking down at her now closed book in her lap.
I nodded and glanced at her bandaged wrist. “May I sit?”
“Sure.” She scooted over.
It was the first time I’d seen her in something other than business wear. Looking at her in a T-shirt and pink sweats, I realized how young she was. She was fresh out of college when she was hired a few months ago. Twenty-two, I thought. Granted I was only a few years older but she looked so innocent. Like life hadn’t hardened her yet. Until recently that is.
“How are you feeling?” I said.
She bit her bottom lip and mumbled, “Stupid.”
A deep despair radiated from her and I scooted closer. “I know we didn’t spend a lot of time together, but I just wanted to tell you that if you ever need to talk, I’m here.”
“What am I supposed to say? I had an affair with a married politician.” Water laced her eyes. “I made a mistake. It was wrong and I feel terrible about it. And there was a video . . .”