“Not you. Your mother and I made this bed. And I get that you can’t walk away from family like you can walk away from me. But you asked me why I didn’t take the money. Why I wanted to keep Andrew from you. She’s a large reason why.”
“You were wrong.”
“I was wrong to keep him from you. Absolutely, but I’m going to be honest with you Devin, I’m scared to death of what your mother might say or do to Andrew.”
His jaw tightened but he didn’t defend her. “I won’t let anyone hurt him.”
I tried to smile because this was going to be my life from now on. Me and Devin trying to be civil while co-parenting Andrew.
“You should probably get back to him. He’s a good boy, but he is four and likes to explore.”
“One more thing,” he said as I turned to leave.
“I want him to take my name.”
It was a fair request and yet the timing was such that I felt like he was purposefully trying to hurt me. I nodded my agreement and then started up the street since I hadn’t asked the car to stay. I’d get a block away and then decide what to do next. I didn’t have to work. I didn’t have to be with my son. I didn’t want to be at home or with my parents. What was there to do for a sad lonely woman in New York City?
26
Devin
I trotted back inside, pushing aside the idea that mother twice interfered with my relationship with Serena. Serena was wrong to keep Andrew from me, but I couldn’t deny that it would be impossible for her to go up against my mother. Serena was right, my mother was a part of keeping Andrew from me.
“Andrew?” I called when I entered the foyer but didn’t see him. Oh shit, had I fucked up already.
“You looking for this guy?” my sister said, at the top of the stairs that went to the main floor. “I found him exploring. You should probably deter him from that. The monster won’t like it.”
Andrew’s eyes widened. “There’s a monster.”
“Jesus, Bri, don’t scare him. There’s no monster,” I said, taking the steps up two-by-two.
“Mother. I meant mother.” She smirked at me. “Breakfast is ready.”
“Give me a minute.”
She bent down and looked at Andrew. “If he gets too boring, you come see your Auntie Bri, okay?”
He nodded. “Okay.”
She headed toward the dining room.
“It probably is best if you don't explore alone,” I said. “You can with me or Bri.” When I reached him, I squatted down to his level. “Did you have breakfast?”
His head bobbed up and down. “Toast and peanut butter.”
“For breakfast?” Was that a real breakfast?
“It has protein. Mommy says I need protein in the morning for my brain.” He pointed to his head.
“What about eggs?”
He squished up his face. “Yuck.”
“Pancakes?”
“I like pancakes but those are only for the weekend. Is it the weekend?”
“Yes. I’ve got pancakes for you this morning, if you’re hungry.”