“That’s it.”
I turned my head to look out the window on my side of the car as I realized he didn’t order my coffee. We drove forward, paid for the food, and drove off without him realizing that I didn’t have the one thing I’d asked for. It was a metaphor, I decided. I was invisible to him.
3
Brayden – Sunday
I woke up to a small boy’s feet pressed into my back. I turned over to see Noah between Terra and me in bed. The first time I’d slept with Terra, I remembered thinking I could go the rest of my life waking up with her by my side. Now I struggled to remember the last time I’d held her, much less woke up with her in my arms. It was sad how something so beautiful was now lost.
I quietly rose from bed, putting on my robe and heading out to make coffee. I was pressing the button on the coffee maker when Terra entered the kitchen.
“Will you make me some too?”
“You can have the first cup,” I said, grabbing another coffee pod and cup from the cabinet.
“Will you remember?”
My gaze jerked to hers.
“You forgot to order my coffee yesterday,” she explained. Her expression was unreadable so I wasn’t sure if she was teasing me, hurt, or angry.
“I’m sorry,” I said, turning back to the coffee. I did feel bad, but my guilt also made me mad. Why didn’t she remind me when I was ordering? Was she testing me? Did she want me to fail?
When the coffee was done brewing, I handed her the cup. She took it, and sat at the table. I studied her for a minute, wondering where the woman I married had gone to? Hell, where had the man I’d been gone to?
“Why do you have to sleep with Noah? He should be able to go to bed and stay in his own bed without you.” I put another pod in the coffee maker and added my cup of water.
“He has trouble falling asleep.”
“So?”
She glared at me. “If you were home during bedtime, you’d see just how much trouble it is.”
I was home last night and all I saw was her take him to bed. Until I woke up this morning, I didn’t know she had come to our bed.
I was about to get into it with her, when Lanie appeared in the doorway.
“Are you making clown pancakes again?”
“No clowns today. How about eggs?” I asked, taking my cup and sipping to get a jolt of the bitter brew.
Lanie’s nose scrunched up. “I don’t want eggs.”
Terra picked Lanie up and set her in her lap. “How about German pancakes. That’s a little of both right? Eggs and pancakes?”
“Can I have powdered sugar on mine?” Lanie asked.
Terra had an amused smile; one I never saw directed at me anymore. “Sugar for breakfast?”
“I like sugar.”
“Who doesn’t?” I quipped, sitting across from them. The table between us was like a metaphor for our marriage. We’re together but a solid barrier now separated us.
Terra stood, setting Lanie in the chair. “I’ll make breakfast.”
“What are you plans for today?” I asked.
“Lanie and I are going shopping with Emma and Nina today. It will give you a chance to spend time with Noah.”