Imperfect Love (Heart of Hope 4)

Later in the evening, when the kids were doing homework, I saw Brayden staring off.

“Is everything okay?” I asked him, rubbing my hand over his shoulder.

“That fish. It makes me think of…” He didn’t finish his sentence. He didn’t have too. I gave him a hug, letting him feel that I was here.

“No kissing,” Lanie yelled at us.

That evening, Brayden spent a little extra time with Noah when it was time for bed. When he finished, he found me looking out the window as I processed what I had to tell him.

“Terra?” His warm, firm hands rested on my shoulders. “What’s going on?”

I turned to look at him. “I went to the doctor today.”

His breath hitched. “What’s wrong? Is the cancer back? Why didn’t you tell me?”

I hated to see the panic in his face. “It’s not cancer.”

His eyes narrowed. “What is it? A tumor?”

I shook my head and took his hand pressing it on my belly. “It’s a baby.”

His gaze shot up to mine, his face filled with shock and confusion. “What?”

“I’m pregnant.”

He continued to look a bit discombobulated. “I thought that couldn’t happen.”

“The doctor says infertility happens to some women and not others.”

“Will it be okay?”

I was having a hard time reading his reaction beyond stunned. Was he happy about this news?

“My gynecologist said that normally they recommend at least two years after treatment, but she feels like eighteen months will be okay.”

He stared at me, bringing his hands to my cheeks. “You’re a fucking goddess, you know that.”

“Does that mean you’re okay with this? I mean the kids are bigger now. Lanie will be eight and Noah six when the baby comes. Some of our travel plans will need to be put on hold.”

“This is a gift. A reward for all we’ve been through,” he said. He frowned again. “Are you unhappy about this?”

I shook my head. “No. To be honest, it makes me feel like a whole woman again. I know it’s silly but…”

“Oh baby.” He pulled me to him, cradling me in his arms. “The kids are going to love having a baby around. And I’m going to be here to help with everything. Feeding. Diapers. All of it. This time I’m going to get it right.”

I lifted my head to look up at him. “You didn’t get it wrong before.”

He smiled. “I missed a lot. I don’t want to miss anything this time.” He kissed me and then laughed. “I suppose it was inevitable, wasn’t it?”

“Oh?” I smiled up at him, so happy that he was excited by the news. “How’s that?”

“We have a lot of sex. I haven’t used a condom since the doctor said it was okay to stop.”

During my treatments, the doctor said Brayden should use a condom, not just to prevent pregnancy, but also to keep him from being exposed to the toxins from chemotherapy.”

“I’ve been on the pill again,” I said. “But then, remember I had the flu and that virus. I missed a few days and was on antibiotics. I guess that combo made the pill ineffective.”

He shook his head. “No. It’s my super amazing sperm and your Goddess eggs.”