“Do you think Jane would have lived in sin with him if the wife was still alive when she returned to Thornfield?” I asked.
“It would have ruined her reputation,” my mother said.
“So? She had her own money now. She didn’t need to worry about a good marriage. Would she toss her piety aside to be with the man she loved? I mean, why did she go back anyway except to be with him.”
My mother smiled. “When I go to heaven, I hope to meet Charlotte Bronte and ask her that question.”
“Yeah, well, you’ll have to wait a long time for the answer then because you’re not going to heaven anytime soon.” With that, I started reading and eventually she fell asleep, as I did I, and missed the meeting.
I’d also been late on delivering a few reports, and on sending some of my business expense receipts to Dina.
Eventually, the call from Jude to check on me came. It was a Friday late morning and my mom was sleeping. I was just getting ready to run a background check for a client.
“Look, I’m sorry man, I know why you’re calling,” I said before he could say anything.
“I’m just worried about you Cy and wondering if you should take a leave. I mean with your mom being sick and now Petal, you’ve got a lot going on.”
“Petal?” My first thought was what the fuck? Did he know about me and Petal?
“Listen, I thought we were brothers. I don’t know you felt the need to keep your relationship with her a secret.”
Fuck. He did know.
“I know what it’s like to be away from the woman you love. You know I do. And I know you endured it as well. I suspect you didn’t want to ask her to wait for you since you’re dealing with your mom, but things have changed right? April and I can help.”
I didn’t know what hell he was talking about. “Petal and I parted amicably,” I said, not sure what to tell him.
“Even so, with the baby, you have to feel torn.”
Baby? What baby?
“Cy?”
“Huh?” I gave my head a shake wondering if I was having one of those weird dreams that happened when falling asleep during the day.
“Talk to me, man. What can I do to help? Of course, April and I will look after Petal because I know your mom is sick, but you can’t ignore your child either.”
My child? What the hell was he talking about? The only thing that made sense was that Petal was pregnant. My first thought was, why didn’t she tell me? The second was, it couldn’t be mine because she would have told me. The third was that she was with another man now, and I was pissed that he got her pregnant.
I scraped my hand over my face. “I didn’t do the background checks on the men she was dating, like I said I would.” It was confirmed. I was a fuck up. “There was a guy, Paul, who was sniffing around her.”
“Are you saying it’s not yours?”
“It can’t be. She’d have told me.” That I knew for sure.
There was silence on the end of the line and dread started to grow.
“She told April it was yours.”
I once got hit in the chest so hard, I couldn’t breathe. That’s what Jude’s words felt like.
“Cy?”
I couldn’t breathe so how could I talk?
“I’m sorry Cy. I was told that Petal had already told you.”
“Listen, Jude, I hate to cut you off, but my mom is calling me. I need to check on her.” It was a lie. Another in several I’d told him.