I shook my head. “I never got that far. I told her I wanted her to come over. I wanted to surprise her, but she was immediately pushing me away, like she does, saying it would be a mistake.”
“What about buying into the restaurant? Your extra savings? Did you tell her about that?”
“I got angry.”
Sinclair’s eyebrows shot up to her hairline. “You? I don’t know that I’ve ever seen you angry.”
I shrugged. “She pushed me too far. Look, I know I’m not perfect, but I’m not worthless. That’s how I felt as she spoke. Like I was lower than pond scum.” I raked my hands through my hair. “Then again, there must be something wrong with me because I fell for her. Why would I love a woman who could treat me like that?”
Sinclair sighed and leaned back in her chair. “Because you always see more to people than what they show us. It’s your superpower.”
“That sounds nuts.”
She smiled at me. “Trina thinks you’re not stable, but the truth is, you’re very steady, at least in temperament and emotions. Most brothers would have been pissed their sister was sleeping with their best friend or their best friend was sleeping with their sister, but not you. You only cared if Wyatt and I were happy. Trina is a fucking nutcase sometimes, and yet, you see the pain she carries from her mother’s leaving and her father’s total ineptitude, and you want to soothe that for her.”
“Not anymore.”
Sinclair gave me a look like she didn’t believe me. “The thing is, what if she did reciprocate your feelings? Are you sure it’s love you feel and not pity?”
“Yes,” I bit out. “But she doesn’t reciprocate so it doesn’t matter.”
“What about the baby?”
“I went to see Jeannette today—”
Sinclair’s eyes widened into shock. “God, is she saying you’re not the father?”
“No, but I want to protect my rights, Sinclair. I wouldn
’t put it past her telling a judge I wasn’t fit.”
“Trina can be over the top, but she wouldn’t do that.”
“No. Why not? She says to my face. She actually told me she could raise the baby on her own. Like I’d simply walk away.”
Sinclair swore under her breath. “I’m sorry, Ryder. Whatever you need from me, is yours. I know Wyatt and mom and dad will be there for you too. We love you. I think you’re the kindest, most open person I know.”
“What about Wyatt?”
She had a lovely smile as Wyatt came to her mind. “He’s the sexiest. And he’s wonderful. But you have such a warm, gentle heart. I hate that Trina trampled on it.”
I rubbed my hand over my heart. “Thanks.”
“Let’s talk about something happy. Are you still playing this weekend at the Harvest Festival?”
“Yes. The band and I practiced yesterday. I’m giving them all the money the city is paying us.”
“Why? If Trina thinks you need to be better with money, shouldn’t you keep some for yourself?” she asked.
“I have a little guilt at taking the Stark gig and not sharing.”
“Would they have played?” she asked.
“I don’t think so, but still. Of course, the city isn’t paying anywhere near what Stark did, but it’s something I can do.”
“See. Such a good heart. Trina needs you and it’s her loss that she can’t see and accept that. Somewhere out there is a woman who’ll totally appreciate you. I understand Erica is still available.”
I laughed. “I think I’m done with women for a time.”