Artemis slams into me from behind, sending me flying into one of the fridges. The metal dents. I don’t. I pick up one of the rolling stainless steel counters and throw it at her, knocking her down. I’m almost to the door. She grabs my foot and tugs, tripping me and climbing onto me to hold me down. I flip onto my back and kick her off. The door is locked, so I break the handle and shoulder it open, the wood splintering and my shoulder screaming in agony.
It’s almost pitch-black. We never bothered wiring this part of the castle, for obvious reasons. I sprint down the damp stone passageway, my heart in my throat. I just got him back. No one gets to take him away from me.
The hallway curves ahead of me, and I can see dim light. Pelly yelps, and I push for another burst of speed. But my foot catches on a stray jumble of stones. I go down hard. It’s enough time for Artemis to catch up to me. She jumps on me, trying to pin me. I throw her off and scramble to my feet. Turning the corner so fast I skid and nearly fall again, I’m greeted with a wide circle of a crumbling room, half the floor covered in rubble. Moonlight streaks in from the gaping holes twelve feet up the wall. One of the holes reveals a vampire scrambling up a rope, Leo following. Honora is standing at the top. She takes Leo’s hand to help him out—he’s climbing out of his own free will—and then they disappear out of my sight.
I run and leap for the hole, but Artemis grabs my foot, interrupting my trajectory. I slam into the wall instead, falling on her.
She rolls so she’s on top, pinning my arm behind me. “You never took the real Watcher lessons. They were all about acceptable sacrifices. Demons are always acceptable sacrifices. Even Leo knows that.”
I slam my elbow up and back, catching her on the jaw. She falls off me, and I jump to my feet. “He’s not a demon! He’s one of us!”
“But it was okay to hurt Honora? She’s one of us too!”
“She chose to leave!”
“So did he! So did I, for that matter! Are you going to break my arm?”
We stand across from each other, chests heaving.
She rubs her jaw. “I’m making the hard decisions. The ones you never could. You have to trust me.”
“How can I?”
“Because I’m your sister. I’ve always protected you.” Artemis sounds hurt. After everything she’s done, she still expects me to trust her? To let her do these terrible things for terrible people? She lured me out of the castle and set vampires on me. She brought hellhounds and vampires into my home. Against people I love.
Leo wanted so desperately to trust his mother that he kept the truth from all of us, and Bradford Smythe paid the ultimate price. I nearly did too.
I don’t trust Artemis. I won’t let myself.
My posture betrays my intentions as I lean toward the hole to go after Leo. Artemis leaps at me. I catch her and throw her against the wall. I spin with the motion, fist raised, and punch as hard as I can. She dodges, barely, and my blow goes against—and into—the crumbling tower wall. It rumbles and cracks.
Artemis and I share one wide-eyed look. I throw her out of the way before half the wall comes down on top of me.
25
BUFFY STANDS ON THE SHORE. I try to reach her. I need to reach her, to talk to her, to get her help. But every time I get close, a roaring wave of darkness grabs ahold of me and drags me backward. Drags me under. I can’t breathe, and I can’t move.
I crawl. I’m almost to her. She stands like a beacon of light, her blond hair brilliant and shining.
“Some things you can’t fight,” she says, crouching low and fixing her sad green eyes on me. “Some things you have to just survive.”
I reach for her. She extends her hand, but the darkness sinks its claws deep into me and pulls me under.
* * *
Something nudges insistently at my shoulder, which in turn makes my shoulder scream in pain. I crack my eyes open, but I can’t see anything.
I also can’t breathe.
Panic surges through me, and I push out with all my might, dislodging the stone and bricks that blanketed me. They tumble down, a small avalanche freed by my movement. I roll away, pretty sure I’m bleeding in more than one place and bruised in every single place possible. But nothing’s broken that I can tell, and Artemis’s coat saved a lot of my skin.
Pelly nudges me again, putting its arm out and making a low chirping noise.
“It’s okay, Pelly. I’ll heal fast. You keep your skin for yourself.” I push to standing, shaking off the dust and bits of stone still clinging to me.
And then everything crashes back down on me in a rush of memory. Leo, climbing out. Artemis, fighting me. Artemis, who is gone, leaving me buried in the rubble.
I sag against the nearest intact wall. Because as much as that hurts, it hurts more that it was my punch that brought down the wall. My punch that was aimed at Artemis. If she hadn’t dodged …