“Sure, why wouldn’t they be?” I didn’t like this conversation. I didn’t like lying to Amber. We’d always been honest—that’s how our relationship started in that small high school bathroom years before. This was me telling her what needed to be said—the right things—not the mixed-up jumble of emotions that rolled over me each and every time I thought, heard, or saw the guys.
So I kept my expression neutral, regardless of the turmoil running beneath.
“Even Anderson?” she pressed. “Because he can be…”
“Difficult, yes, I know.” I pushed my hair over my shoulder. “He and I hashed it out a little while Hayden was in the hospital. I think we both said some things we’d been holding onto for a while, and even though it didn’t solve anything, and holy crap it hurt my feelings, it needed to be said.”
Her eyebrows raised. “What did he say to you?”
I stared down at my glass. “That I ran away and bailed on them.” She didn’t say anything and I looked up. Her expression filled with conflict. “What? You think I ran, too?”
“I think you made a choice. One that was difficult to make under the circumstances.”
“Do you think it was the right choice?” I asked.
“I think things got complicated, and sometimes going from a relationship when you’re just a kid to an adult is hard. Ginger and I have made a thousand adjustments as adults. Paying bills, dealing with job stress, making decisions and the basics of settling into a long-term relationship. That rush from the early days is gone, but if you stick through it something else emerges. Something really good.”
“You think I should have tried harder?”
“No, I didn’t say that. I just think what you guys had was incredibly complex. There was probably no win, you know?”
“Well, for what it’s worth, I’m really happy for you. I’m glad you and Ginger are win-win.”
She grinned. “You were there for it all. My angsty youth. My awkward coming out. All my freak-outs and panics over Ben.”
“I was just happy to have a friend that was as much of a mess as I was! And I’m the one that owes you thanks for being my best friend through all of this. I mean, it’s not like you didn’t know you were getting involved in a drama-fest the first day we met, but to stick through it all these years? I couldn’t ask for anything more.”
The door swung open and a rush of cool air tumbled into the room. All eyes shifted to the entrance and my stomach clenched at the sight of the four of them. Jackson strode in first, curly hair dipped in front of his eyes; his grin spread when he spotted us. Oliver, still a surprising sight with his more defined adult body, held the door for Hayden, who entered the restaurant on crutches, limping and grimacing the entire way. His gray eyes linked with mine and that familiar chill ran down my spine. Anderson came in last, handsome as always, jaw tense and his mind whirring with internal thoughts.
“Damn,” Amber muttered. “The Allendale Four grew up.”
“They sure as hell did.”
“Heaven…”
“I know,” I said, consuming the last of my drink. The burn of the liquid was replaced by something else entirely. “They’re as dangerous now as they were then.”
“That’s not what I was going to say.”
“What then?”
“That these guys may be more dangerous than before.”
She gestured to the bartender and ordered me another drink.
“What’s that for?”
“You’re going to need that to get through the night.”
The big news went over as expected; Ginger and Amber ridiculously adorable and the guys beyond happy for them. I kept the smile plastered on my face and desperately tried not to think about how their relationship was going in the right direction while my past ones were stuck in shark-infested water and there was nothing new in sight.
“Need another drink?” Jackson asked, sliding into the empty seat next to mine.
I shook my head. “I stopped after two. Amber and Ginger do not deserve having to deal with drunk Heaven at their engagement announcement.”
“Drunk Heaven can be fun.”
I shook my head. “Not for all of us. Ask Anderson’s car and shoes.”